Worth
by Joosetta
Summary: An old betrayal has left Sasuke and Naruto torn apart. Can Sakura mend the rift? SasuNaruSaku,
1. Chapter 1

Naruto is the property of Kishimoto.

Worth- Part 1

Naruto was used to whispers. Whispers had always followed him- adults whispering behind their hands when he was a child. Children whispering behind his back at school. Whispering, and pointed looks, and barely hidden disgust. That was why it was so refreshing to have someone tell it to him straight.

Uzumaki Naruto! I am going to KILL YOU! You ugly, fuzzy headed, ignorant, foolish, no-brained, idiot!!

He was sure he had never seen Sakura so angry. There had been moments, when a mad sort of glint had flickered in her usually calm green eyes and he did fear for his life, but this was on an entirely different level.

You led thirteen DEFENCELESS children into THAT forest?! On your OWN, without informing me, or Kakashi-san or ANYONE!

Naruto was willing to admit that it hadn't been his most stunning plan, but they hadn't gone far, and everyone had come back in one piece.

CHILDREN NARUTO. CHILDREN.

Behind him, Konoha's finest- 12 chubby, grimy six year olds- tittered nervously. It wasn't good for them when Naruto-sensei got in trouble. And Sakura-sensei was /scary/.

Err, well yes. I just wanted to show them this tree, you know. . .

Sakura wasn't buying it.

We have PLENTY of trees in the training grounds and the village!

Naruto frowned, scuffed his toe in the dust, then suddenly, sharply, spun on his 12 giggling charges. They quivered, staring up at their teacher and tried very hard to look innocent. Sakura had fallen silent, but Naruto could still feel her glare.

Alright. Why don't you go home!  
His mock glare had melted into a wide grin, as he waved enthusiastically at his charges.  
Don't forget what I taught you!  
He called after them as they scarpered off, leaving a cloud of dust in their wake.

Unfortunately he hadn't distracted Sakura. She was one moment away from spitting fire.

I tell you what.  
He said, resignedly, roughly scratching his nest of blonde hair.  
Come with me while I get some ramen, and I'll let you shout at me as much as you want.

------

When Sakura had finished, and his bowl was empty, Naruto gave a satisfied sort of sigh, and swung back on his stool. Sakura's expression had melted from outrage, and she was now gazing at him with a sort of good natured weariness.

Will you ever grow up?

She asked, making a little face as he tilted the bowl up to get the dregs.

For a moment, as he grinned, there was a wicked glint in his eyes that didn't bode very well, but it faded back to that quiet, slightly sad expression that Sakura had got used to over the years.

Naruto /had/ grown up, really. He had lost some of his impulsiveness and ambition- but retained the constant energy and irrational mood swings. He fidgeted through meetings and swung between happiness and anger, but there was a steadier sort of vein to his character now, a steel rod running right through him.

Sakura had seen him disciplining one of his pupils, and when he was angry he became someone else, someone with a presence that seemed to burst out and shred the leaves on the trees.

Sakura said softly, and she saw his fist clench at her tone. He knew what she was going to ask.

  
He shrugged loosely, and rubbed the back of his neck. Sakura picked out the silver glint of the chain against his skin but it was soon hidden by his hair.  
Not tonight. I'm tired.

Sakura just watched him stand up and straighten, all loose-limbed, and deceptively strong, like a cat. Nobody knew what they could say to Naruto anymore. Breach certain subjects, and depending on how much he cared about you, you received tight-lipped silence, or blood red fury.

Sakura knew her limits. His appearance was one of them. You told Naruto he looked thin- he wouldn't talk to you for a week. You mentioned his hair was getting pretty long, he stared at you in silence as if you were mad. You dared to suggest that he looked maybe just a little bit like- well kiss your friendship goodbye.

And then there was the question of what he was doing. Naruto was teaching. But unlike the other jounin, Sakura included, he was teaching the young children, wandering around the village with them trailed behind him, pointing out this and that and rambling on about trees and fish and people he sort of knew. He took missions. A class ones, solo - usually coming back as unscathed as if he had never gone at all. But.

His ambition was missing. Sakura knew that Naruto had the potential to be the greatest Hokage Konoha had ever known. He was fair, and thoughtful, and powerful - so powerful sometimes that Sakura felt she might be sucked up into him and never be set down. She didn't know whether she was truly afraid of that or not. The subject of who would become the sixth Hokage had arisen once, and all eyes had turned to Naruto. He had said no- just once, but no-one had ever asked again.

Sometimes Sakura looked at Naruto and wondered where the bratty, obnoxious little boy had gone- the one who had repeated confidently, brashly, that he would be the next Hokage. Sure, Naruto was still obnoxious, and difficult, and surprisingly clumsy. He was still deceptive, and confusing, and Sakura never knew whether she hated him or loved him.

Are you just gonna stare at me? Or are you gonna pay?

Sakura scowled, and paid.

-------

Naruto was hungry and it was only mid morning. He rubbed one hand over his stomach absent mindedly, and listened to it grumble. The kids were trying to build a raft, struggling to lift logs and strap them together. They hadn't thought of using their budding chakra yet, and Naruto had decided to simply watch and let them learn from their mistakes.

Unfortunately, lying in the sun, stretched across the grass just above the river bank made him sleepy. And hungry.

The sky was endless and blue, the clouds so high and distant that they were barely wisps. Naruto felt peaceful, and easy, and slow and-

A chubby, pale little face invaded his vision, serious grey eyes and a childish pout obscuring the clouds above. Arakawa Miho was half a year younger than her classmates, an odd thoughtful little child who seldom took part in their games.

Miho-chan- why aren't you helping the team?

Naruto chanced a glance down to the river where two of the kids seemed to be drowning while the others tried to fish them out with sticks and ropes. Naruto watched silently as the two were hauled ashore, wet and grinning. Beside him Miho made a disgusted sort of snort.

They aren't doing it right.  
She said sniffing.  
They need to use chakra to lift the logs. It isn't hard.

She rubbed at her mop of black hair disdainfully, and Naruto smirked, amused.

Why don't you tell them that then?  
He offered, sitting up and tugging her t-shirt straight. She scowled at him.

Why should I?  
She said defiantly, chin jutting out. Naruto felt a tiny squeeze on his heart. Why was that so familiar? Miho was clever, and from all appearances unusually talented. And she knew it. Somehow though, she lacked something- like the genius kids often did- that thing that made children want to gang together, to work as a team.

Naruto remembered how badly things could go when kids like these grew up. Strength and isolation seemed to go hand in hand, and those kids- those high fliers- they were always the ones that came the closest to turning bad. What could he do, right now- to show Miho what a team was?

I don't know.  
Naruto said softly.  
Do you want to ride on the raft?

The little girl shook her head and rolled her eyes.

I don't want to ride on the stupid raft. My daddy said I could only read his scrolls once I had read everything in his library- I think reading is much better than playing out here all day!

Naruto pretended to think about it, rubbing his chin pensively.

Mm, I suppose so.

Miho looked surprised, but pleased that her teacher agreed. Naruto pursed his lips, a frown fixed on his face.

But- hey do you know what are in those scrolls?

Miho grinned, a question she no doubt knew the answer to.  
The jutsu! Abilities to make me a strong ninja. Just like my father!

Naruto nodded, picking at a blade of grass.  
And those jutsu just came out of nowhere? I mean, who invented them and stuff?

That question made Miho think a little harder. Down on the shore the children were trying to make a makeshift crane from an overhanging tree.

Well. . . other ninjas? Great ninjas like Hokage-sama!  
She watched Naruto twirl the blade of grass between his fingers intently, as if he too was going to make some great magic with it.

I see! So ninjas invented the different jutsu? But why? I mean if we had some jutsu already, why invent more?

Miho scowled.

Because they needed to, stupid!

Naruto tilted his head, feigning confusion.

Heh- but, when would you need a jutsu? I mean what are jutsu for anyway?

This gained a tremendous snort from the girl as she stamped her foot in frustration.

Jutsu make you a strong ninja!  
She was practically shouting.

  
All of Naruto's teasing stopped as he dropped the blade of grass and stared Miho straight in the eye.  
Jutsu do not make you strong. They are tools. If I fought you, and you had a kunai, when I had none- would that make you stronger, or greater than me?

The little girl froze, eyes flickering as she thought about it.

  
She said eventually, voice thoughtful.

We need jutsu, not just for fighting and killing, but to outwit, or confuse our enemy- sometimes maybe just to get out of a tricky situation. Or to do something useful. If we had a building-a-raft-no jutsu, wouldn't that be useful right now?

He gestured to the struggling youngsters knee-deep in the river. Miho followed his gaze and for a moment her expression was one of longing.

You see,  
Naruto said softly in her ear.  
These great ninjas who invented those jutsu, didn't do it in a library, from reading books. They went outside and discovered problems and battles, and found themselves in situations where they needed to think quick. They made discoveries by shaping their chakra, and combining jutsu, and the jutsu didn't make them great, or give them the title of jounin or even Hokage. It saved their lives and the lives of their team mates.

Miho nodded slowly, and turned back to Naruto. She was biting her lip a little, expression shy.

I- I'm sorry I called you stupid Naruto-sensei.

Naruto grinned wickedly and ruffled her hair.

Don't worry bout it- I've been called much worse! Now let me tell you a little secret- and you can share it with the rest of your team down there. This task is too difficult for them if they just splash around like that unorganised. You've got to go down there and tell them to work as a team ok?

Miho nodded sharply, the beginnings of a smile on her pale little face, and in a split second turned and rushed down to the river, waving her arms wildly. Naruto stretched back on the grass and focusing once again on the sky returned to being hungry.

He wasn't sure if he dozed off or not, but he remembered the lazy feeling, lying there in the sun- the sound of the river and the children's laughter in his ears. He remembered the peaceful heat that sunk into his skin, and the tickle of the grass against his cheeks.

And he remembered pain.

He felt a sudden and enormous surge of energy, adrenaline- as if he was fighting, and losing, and pulling on that strength he wasn't fond of touching. On its heels he felt anger, rage- loneliness so strong it made him dig his fingernails _-his claws- _into the sandy earth. And then he felt the pain, so sudden and harsh- burning a tattoo into his skin that started around his navel and burst along every limb, like every vein in his body was bursting with liquid fire.

And just like that it passed, taking the energy and the anger with it. Naruto sat up slowly and stiffly, the brush of his t-shirt against the raw skin of his stomach making him wince.

Down by the river, Miho had directed her team into constructing a sturdy looking raft. It bobbed happily on the river, all twelve children balanced on board- waving and laughing. Naruto sighed and smiled weakly, before stumbling to his feet.

Alright! Nice one! You want me to teach you how to steer that thing now?

He scrambled down to the bank as the children cheered, and tried very hard not to think about the pain, or even worse - the sudden loss of control.

--------

Really it's nothing!  
Naruto protested weakly. Sakura simply glared at him from her seat until he sat down. She hadn't expect Naruto to start shaking when she handed him the mission brief, or for his eyes to roll back in his skull and the paper to burst into flame between his shivering fingers. Nothing indeed.

You've been out of sort for weeks now. Late for every single one of your lessons, passing out in the street and /destroying/ one of the classrooms!?

Naruto winced. Thank god there had been no children for that outbreak. The wooden desks had blistered and charred, the blackboard melted down the wall. And the windows - bulging in and out with the pressure before shattering over him. A thousand tiny cuts that healed as soon as they formed, skin searing with the speed of his chakra.

That was just a little accident, I just-

Sakura looked as if she was torn between anger and worry. And perhaps a little fear.

Naruto. Are you having problems with your seal?  
The answer was just a little too quick, and a little too vehement. Sakura shifted and turned her face away from him, swallowing once, twice, three times. After that short pause she turned back, determination setting her jaw. Sakura had never been a pretty girl, and she hadn't grown to be a beautiful woman- but she had a certain something that glinted behind her eyes and sparked along her confident posture. When she looked like that Naruto was reminded of a time years before.

Do you need Tsunade-sama's help?

Naruto looked at his hands.

I don't think she can, really.

He said eventually, one finger pressing his stomach slightly. His skin was still raw and sore underneath, the tattoo as painful as if it had been freshly branded onto his skin.

What on earth do you mean?

Outside Naruto could hear the children laughing as they ran across the square. He had set them a task while he was on his mission, and he could hear Miho's clear little voice directing them. A natural leader.

  
Naruto began wearily.  
The seal seems to have a time limit it on it. Apparently.

Sakura blinked. When she spoke her voice was caustic.

Yes /apparently/ Naruto- but /apparently/ that limit is 5000 years, so it can't be that.

Naruto winced. He shouldn't have expected Sakura to just leave it at that. He scratched his hair nervously, burying his fingers down by the back of his neck. He ached.

Well maybe something happened to it a few years back that cut that time limit. . somewhat.

Sakura's reaction was electric. In a flash she was on her feet, one hand fisted in the neck of his t-shirt a kunai balanced, deadly, in the other.

So shall I just kill you now then?  
Sakura didn't flicker, even though she wasn't sure she could, even had she wanted to.  
What could possibly justify you failing to mention this? Go on tell me? I could do with a LAUGH.

Naruto just looked at her sadly, then parted his lips in that odd way he had, when Sakura was sure he wanted to do something strange and exciting, like kiss her.

I thought I had time. Anyway, there is only one person who can fix the seal. The same person who broke it.  
Sakura began, kunai dropping a little.  
  
Naruto said, and winced. Sakura had tugged him sharply forward and his sensitive stomach was pressed against the edge of her desk. She noticed and swiftly released him, instead reaching down to tug his shirt up.

Naruto hissed. It hadn't looked that bad a few hour ago. The seal was practically pulsing with malevolent chakra, the surrounding skin inflamed and red. Inside the lines of the tattoo his skin was cracked and black.

Oh Naruto.  
Sakura said gently, moving round her desk to kneel in front of him. Her fingers were cool and almost soothing against his blistered skin.  
You stupid idiot.

Naruto was willing to concede that, yes he was a stupid idiot. But it dying was better than the alternative.

Who was it then?  
Sakura asked, her breath cool against his stomach. Naruto considered lying but she was far too close to delicate areas for that.

Sakura let out a long, knowing sigh. Her head dropped and her hands slid from his hips to her lap, a limp limbed weariness sinking into her.  
Can he fix it?

Naruto tugged his t-shirt down and placed one hand gently on the crown of her head. Sakura had never grown her hair again, and in fact it had been hacked even shorter, the rough spikes almost shorter than his own. It suited her grim, steady face.

I would imagine so.  
His tone was light. The Uchiha prodigy was another one of those forbidden subjects. Sakura didn't have to persuade herself not to mention it though, she didn't want to bring it up either.

  
Suddenly businesslike Sakura stood and swallowed the bile rising at the back of her throat.  
We had better find him.

Naruto shrugged, tilting his head, as if to say he didn't care. He had already turned to go to the door.

And then you'll kill him, right?

He stopped , shoulders briefly filling the doorway. Sakura felt so- so much all at once for him, because for a minute she felt a little bit like this was her brother, and he was going out to die. But Naruto wasn't quite her brother, and he wasn't dead yet. Sasuke however-

Naruto nodded gravely and gave a strange and painful grin.


	2. Chapter 2

NAruto is the property of Kishimoto

Worth - Part 2

It was all very well saying she would find Sasuke. Sakura groaned and dropped her head onto her desk. She wanted to cry, or do something as equally childish, like destroy her office. Uchiha Sasuke was the most elusive missing-nin on the entire continent. Team after team had returned empty handed, even the ANBU sent to destroy him were left with nothing.

Yet sometimes, Sakura was sure he was in the bushes just over her shoulder, or in the middle of the swell of people crossing the street. She would stand very still, as if she was faced with some wild beast poised to bolt, and pray he would come to her. He never did.

Ah, Sasuke-kun.  
She whispered into the mission briefs littering her desk.  
Would you come to save Naruto?

Her only answer was silence.

----

Sakura eventually decided that the only person qualified to find Sasuke was herself. It was a partly selfish decision- she wanted to be the first to see him- and she was sure, that if she found somewhere quiet, and waited for that feeling, the feeling of being watched- she could lure him out. Somehow. If she had thought for amoment, she might have realised this was irrational. But she didn't want to be there if- /when/- Naruto died.

Tsunade had passed her verdict. The seal was indeed breaking, and the only way the healer could fix it, was kill Naruto and reseal the kyuubi in his corpse. The original seal was designed to last into death, but Sasuke's ministrations had shortened the seal's lifespan to a thousandth of its original limit. The only way to rebuild the seal and keep Naruto alive, was to reverse the jutsu that had been cast on him.

And the only way to do that, was to find Sasuke.

For the time being Naruto had been locked in a safe room in the academy. Sakura was almost afraid to visit him- the pulse of chakra from within had grown and grown by the hour. But she knew that if she left, without seeing him she wouldn't forgive herself. If he died. If he died and left her as the last member of team 7. The last one to hold the memories- and the legends.

At first Sakura thought a lamp was lit, but the dim red light was pulsing from Naruto himself. He was stretched out on the floor, hands fisted tightly at his sides, head tossed to one side. She couldn't see his face, but the tension along every muscle illustrated clearly how much pressure he was under from the kyuubi. He looked like a tightly strung bow.

Kneeling beside him Sakura dropped a hand to hover a few inches above his skin. The reaction was electric. Naruto snapped his head round and grabbed the collar of Sakura's dress, skin feverish and hot, eyes glazed - the colour of blood.

He blinked for a moment, then shivered, releasing her.

His voice was harsh, and gravelly, and his teeth seemed almost too big for his mouth. Sakura had seen Naruto, once before, with the kyuubi running wild through him, but it had been nothing like this. Before, Naruto had embraced it- now it seemed to be eating him up from the inside.

Getting kinda tricky- heh.

He coughed and licked his lips. They were cracked and raw, one little bead of blood welling up, only to be caught by his tongue. Sakura felt a little like crying. This wasn't fair.

I'm- going to find Sasuke.

Naruto twitched at the name, and Sakura was so afraid he was going to lose control. The red light dimmed for a moment.

Good. Kick his ass or something.

Sakura wasn't sure if Naruto heard her, or understood her. He seemed very far away, as if he was reliving something very painful, from his past- or maybe from someone else's past. Sakura didn't want to touch him in case she triggered the seal, but she also wanted to soothe his fever and hold him close enough that he could hear her heart beating and hear how steady it was.

Torn, Sakura decided simply ro press one fingertip against his temple, and push back a strand of hair, stained dark with sweat. Naruto's fevered eyes flickered up to hers, slightly more focused, and Sakura wondered if she saw his raw lips twitch into a tiny smile.

You still here Sakura-chan? If you don't hurry-

He chuckled a little, voice rumbling and vibrating along her arm.

Ow. You won't catch the bugger.

Sakura smiled. She had touched Naruto many a time, grabbed his wrist, slapped him,pushed him down, hugged him even pressed a kiss to his forehead. But this- one finger resting just below his hair, just so- was the most intimate touch they had ever shared.

-----

Naruto couldn't feel anything but the pain anymore. He felt like he was drowning in it, wave after wave- each one stronger. It took all his willpower to hold onto himself, onto the last few strands that kept everything together. It was odd, but he only had one memory left to hold onto. He was twelve, and he was trying to climb a tree. He couldn't even remember why- or who had told him to, but it was important- /so important/ - to reach that kunai buried in the bark.

But it kept getting further and further away, and his vision was a black circle that got smaller and smaller. And all he could feel was disappointment, because he had failed, and the kunai was still there, far to high to reach.

And then he remembered nothing. It hurt like hell, and he couldn't remember why, or what his name was, and that made him angry. Really angry. He screamed, but he couldn't hear himself, only voices, stranger's voices.

You stupid idiot.  
He thought he remembered that.  
Look, see - he's dead.  
Oh no, he wasn't. He wasn't dead -watch out-  
It's all over.  
Naruto. That's right. Naruto was his name.  
Can you hear me Naruto? It's all over!  
But then there were ten fingers pressed against his stomach and enough sharp pain to make him pass out, true darkness claiming him.

-----

Sakura didn't know where to start. She couldn't seem to remember all those places where she had felt Sasuke before. She couldn't seem to remember anything in the forest, all the paths seemed unfamiliar, and every tree loomed over her. All she could do, was wander, and pause, and wander. There were countless signs of people passing this way and that, but she couldn't tell. The last footprint of Sasuke's she had seen had been that of a boy.

And that boy was stuck in Sakura's mind. Sasuke could have walked up to her, a man, countless times- and she would have dismissed him, somehow searching for that fifteen year old who had run off with Naruto to fight and never come back.

Sakura felt tight inside, as if she wanted to cry- but somehow the tears wouldn't come, her eyes remained searching, her heartbeat steady- all the control of a good ninja. Her problem had always been control- not of her chakra, but of her emotions, her temper, her crazy infatuations. She had failed her friends and her village because of that lack of control - so she trained, and trained- until control was everything she had. She may not have had a list of jutsu the length of the continent, but control was what she was good at.

Too good. She didn't cry when she ran across the same crossroads for the third time. She didn't cry when the flash of black out of the corner of her eye had been a bird. She didn't cry when the feeling of being watched grew to such an intensity that her skin prickled and her hair seemed ruffled by invisible breath.

She didn't cry when Uchiha Sasuke walked out of the shadow of a tree and stood before her.

Oh good.  
She said eventually.  
I thought you would be here.

He hadn't changed as much as Sakura thought he would. Taller maybe, hair longer, and if possible more roughly cut. His face was thin and tired, but his eyes still dark and suspicious. Maybe it was just time- but Sakura wasn't sure how handsome he was really. She hadn't been expecting a chorus of angels heralding his arrival, but she barely felt the twinge of attraction. This was the man who had left her as the boy she loved. He stood there, and he looked the same, not like Naruto- Naruto who had become a stranger.

The seal.

Sasuke said, and his voice was deeper than she had been expecting. Sakura shivered- it wasn't a question. She couldn't really find any reply to that statement, so instead she nodded and turned away from him, towards the village.

Come on then.

When she began to walk, she heard him follow.

-----

Arakawa Miho was on a mission. Konoha, was by nature a very leafy village, trees clustered at every crossroads, lining every street. Naruto-sensei had given the class a task, blue eyes serious and expression determined.

Find me-  
He had said, scanning each and every stubborn little face. Miho had shifted nervously.  
The TALLEST tree in the village.  
There was a collective murmur.

  
Naruto-sensei had dropped his voice to a mysterious whisper.  
Measure it! I'll be back to check your measurements soon! Until then keep out of trouble!  
And thus, Miho had recieved her first mission.

She had led her troops all through the village, trying to gauge the height of the trees from the collected average height of 4 foot 3 inches. It was difficult, but Miho thought she had cracked it.

  
The class had somehow appointed her as leader, and fell silent as she spoke.  
We have to measure this tree here- for when Naruto-sensei gets back!  
As her friends gathered around to work out /how/ to measure the tree however, Miho found herself gazing across the street to the academy. She wasn't sure, but she had the feeling that something bad was happening. The sky was dark and overcast, like a storm was brewing- with no way to release. Miho hated muggy tense weather- she preferred the outright violence of the storms.

When she was very small, her sister had clambered onto the roof during a storm to pull the skylight down. The wind and rain had ripped her from the roof and swept her away like a rag doll in a torrential flood. Miho had watched and thought- how exciting it must have been being tossed about in the storm like that, in the belly of a monster. She was far to young to undertsand what it meant when they finally found her sister, battered and broken, stretched across the twisted branches of a tree.

  
She turned back to her friends, who were trying, unsuccesfully, to forma a human pyramid. They were always full of ideas, she though scowling, but really, this was ridiculous.  
Oi! Idiots! Not like that!  
And she had soon forgotten about her foreboding altogether.

--------

Sasuke looked at the tops of the buildings as he walked through Konoha. He looked above the people and above the streets and tried not to think about what he was doing. This used to be his home and as much as he wish he couldn't feel it- it was painful to be walking there again.

He shrugged his shoulders tightly and met a few of the inquisitive gazes along the street. He didn't recognise anyone, but he didn't trust his memory either. One of these strangers could approach him, and the moment they spoke they would become someone from his past who had reduced, with time, to simply a name.

A dark haired man was blocking the way, expression somewhere between suspicion and anger. He wore the green vest of a Chuunin, and had an easy fighting stance to him. That was always the first thing Sasuke noticed about anyone.

What- What is he doing back here!? Where are you going.

Sasuke didn't even pause in his path. He knew where the nine-tails- where /Naruto/- was. He brushed past the stranger, someone he maybe knew, and carried on, eyes leveled on the street ahead. Behind him he heard Sakura hiss, in an oddly familiar way. She used to do that, when he and Naruto annoyed her.

Get out of the way, idiot! We're going to fucking save this village!

Sasuke didn't wait for her, but she was quick to catch up, expression grim. He ignored the shocked faces at the academy, heading instead for the pulse of chakra that was emanating from one of the old classrooms. The door was locked, and he broke it with the heel of his hand, letting it bang behind him.

Inside it was crimson- the air thick with the chakra of the nine-tails. Sasuke could almost feel the pulse of it burning his skin. Naruto was stretched out in the middle of the room, head tossed toone side. Sasuke couldn't see his face.

The closer he got, the more painful it became, and Sasuke scowled darkly. There had been a time when he had almost understood the chakra of the nine-tails, and even embraced it. That strength, that inhuman intensity- it was something he coveted, something that had never been his. He grew from hating the feel of it in the air, to savouring the tingle of it along his skin.

And when he bent over Naruto and saw his expression, trapped in a grimace, he was amazed. He recognised Naruto perfectly- not because of how his features had remained the same, but of the changes that he had somehow already predicted. This was Naruto. Sasuke had seen his own face grow older, and traced his features with amazement, but he was somehow hardly surprised to see the way Naruto had grown.

  
Sakura had moved to stand beside him, arms wrapped tightly around her stomach. Sasuke grimaced and rolled his sleeves up.

Stand back.  
He didn't even check to see if she had followed his orders.

--------

When Naruto woke up, he didn't at first consider what that meant. He simply allowed himself to enjoy the feel of the sheets under his fingertips, and the way the sunlight splashed onto the glass of the vase and curved over the petals of the daffodil bobbing gently in the breeze. It was simple to say that the air in Konoha smelled like leaves, but it did- that green, fresh scent caught from the treetops and carried to the infirmary, and Naruto's bed.

If he was alive, then the seal had been fixed. If the seal had been repaired, then it had been done by Sasuke. Naruto felt a tiny shiver, hairs raising on this arms and the back of his neck. Thinking  
about Sasuke wouldn't help him.

It was a struggle to lift his head. The chakra of the nine-tails, and it's regenerative strengths, seemed to be dim and hidden inside him. He craned his neck, wincing a little, to see that the weight on his legs was Sakura, her head rested on her folded arms, face hidden, hair bedraggled. Naruto smiled. The movement seemed to have triggered his chakra, and tentatively he felt for it, wincing as it pulsed to his fingertips in a painful rush. He forced it down, and concentrating, eased out enough to help him heal.

As his knotted muscles loosened, Naruto sat up further, trying not to disturb Sakura. In the wastepaper basket lay five withered daffodils. He reached over to straighten her headband, and she shifted, groaning.

Go away.

She mumbled, turning her head and opening her eyes. Naruto grinned and flicked back her fringe.For amoment she looked sleepily up at him, unguarded, and then the reality of thie sistuation dawned on her and she leapt to her feet.

For a moment Naruto found himself completely disorientated. This was Sakura, throwing her arms around his neck, and this was the hospital room- but it rang eerily with a memory that hovered just behind his eyelids. Back then it had been Sasuke recieving the hug, surprised face tilted up to the ceiling in boyish embarrassment. Naruto shivered again, and returned to hug, as if pulling Sakura closer could allow him to forget.

  
He mumbled, his throat dry and sore. Sakura snorted and sat back, rubbing her eyes. She grabbed a glass and poured him some water, hands shaking a little. Naruto wondered if she had been scared.

Thank you.  
As he drank, Naruto let himself close his eyes. In a few moments he was going to have to get up and face a lot of very painful things. He had tried very hard to persuade himself he was an amnesiac, and that it didn't matter, but he should have known he would have to deal with it sooner or later.

I take it the seal was fixed?

Sakura gave him a very pointed look.

Is he dead?  
Naruto asked putting the glass carefully down beside the vase. He was hungry. Sakura flinched and shook her head.

Of course not. Not, yet.

She wanted to ask Naruto if he really didn't care, if he could watch Sasuke die, if he could do the deed himself. She watched as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, and stretched- as if he was getting up after a nice long nap, not a 5 day coma. With a long groan he was on his feet, grabbing for his t-shirt and tugging it over his ruffled hair. Sakura didn't even attempt to stop him.

How are the kids?  
It was a change of subject, and a very unsubtle one. Sakura smiled- no-one could beat Naruto for barefaced cheek.

As industrious as always. They were asking for you- something about a tree.

Naruto grinned, white teeth seeming- like always, just a little bit feral.

Aha! That's good, it means they've probably finished the task I set them.  
He cackled.  
Now I can find out how they did it and criticise them for loads of tiny things - just like Iruka-sensei used to do!

His excitement was an abrubt change from the solemn and weary man who had asked her a few minutes ago, whether she had killed Sasuke. Sakura embraced this lighter mood; she had no idea when he might be like it again.

  
She began, looking at her feet. She heard him sigh and the air in the room crackled with a kind of release.  
Tsunade-sama wants you and Sasuke to complete the report of Orochimaru's death together.

She felt, rather than saw Naruto's angry grimace, and winced as she felt the pulse of power that followed it. He seemed to struggle with it for a minute, then turned, fists shaking.

WHY!? I filled that report in YEARS AGO. Why dig it up now!?

Sakura took a step back, despite herself. His eyes were crimson slits, his teeth bared in fury.

Tsunade wants the full account! You simply said you passed out and woke up with Sasuke gone!

Naruto growled, shaking. Sakura hoped frantically that he was under control.

THERE IS NOTHING MORE TO SAY! What do you NEED?!

The vase was rattling on the bedside table, and on closer inspection Sakura could see the water was bubbling. Her ears popped and she winced at the increasing pressure.

WE NEED THE TRUTH!  
She shrieked.  
WE NEED THE TRUTH FOR SASUKE'S HEARING-

The pressure abruptly dropped, the water in the vase ceasing its violent swell. Naruto sunk back, expression bewildered.

Hearing? What about? He was a missing-nin for almost five years! He betrayed the village!

Sakura shook her head sadly.

We don't know that Naruto. He deserves a chance to explain himself- don't you think?

Naruto jerked forwards, as if he were about to grab her and stopped himself at the very last moment. The temperature dropped suddenly and Sakura shivered.

I don't THINK.  
Naruto hissed, as he passed her on the way to the door.

He slammed it so hard the hinges bent, and behind her Sakura heard the glass vase shatter, the daffodil falling limply onto the floor.


	3. Chapter 3

Naruto is the property of Kishimoto.

Worth-Part 3

It took Naruto a few minutes of storming through the hospital to completely calm down. He knew he should go back, apologise and get properly dressed, put on his headband and do his duty, but he was pissed off and tired- and going back up there to face Sakura and maybe Sasuke was just asking for an explosion of some sort.

It was easier for him to get angry like that- to let the anger surge in and out with his chakra. To keep it forced in and under control, Naruto knew he would have to let it simmer all the time, a long slow resentment. He didn't want that. He wanted to be left as he was, to forget about how his life had been, to run around Konoha with his pupils, to live from one pot ramen to another. He wanted to go back to when it all didn't matter, and he could scream and lose control as much as he wanted- and eat stale noodles until he popped.

It was all much easier that way.

No-one looked twice as he trotted out of the hospital, plastering on a grin that was as wide as ever. He would go and find the kids,. and then he would go home and have some ramen, and maybe fit a few hours shuriken training before he went to bed. Life was as simple as he made it after all. His only responsibility to Konoha had been fulfilled when he was a baby- no-one could ask much more.

----------

Naruto cowered before the collective glare of his class.

You went away for /ages/!

Miho cried accusingly, her team all nodding in agreement behind her. Naruto grinned apologetically, wishing he were back at an age when 5 days seemed like forever. Now 5 years felt like a week, and days rattled past faster than he could count.

Well, y'know- I had a little accident. I hope you were nice to Iruka-sensei while I was gone!

Miho made a face.

Iruka-sensei is boring. He made us do a test.

There was a small chorus of retching noises behind her, as the class expressed their disgust at the idea of a test.

A test huh? On what?

Naruto had settled himself underneath a tree, legs sprawled out in the dust, his pupils ranged around him with Miho at the front.

On RULES.  
A raggedy haired little boy- Koinu- piped up bravely from the back. Naruto made a huge show of thinking it over, scratching his chin and rubbing his nose. If the class had noticed that their teacher was without a headband, in crumpled, slept in clothes, and unshaven- they had decided not to mention it.

  
Naruto had their entire, gleaming-eyed attention.  
I would say rules are pretty important myself. Do you know why?

There was a stunned sort of silence, and then a quiver of heads being shaken. Naruto grinned at that and gestured for them to sit and launched into another lesson, as usual accompanied by ridiculous stories and exaggerated hand gestures. But he never failed to keep them interested- that was what he was best at.

----

Sakura folded her arms around her, and tried to think of something to say. It was about as awkward it could get- really, standing in a room with a man she had once been infatuated with- a man who had divided the village in opinion. Sakura had never known what to believe. On one hand she knew that Sasuke was guilty of something- something that had broken Naruto and changed him beyond recognition.

On the other hand, she had loved and trusted Sasuke with all of her childish sense, and it was hard to see him now, so similar, and put that aside.

Where did he go?

Sasuke spoke without turning to look at her, his voice almost dismissive in its monotony. Sakura shifted uncomfortably.

I don't know. Probably to see his class.

Sakura didn't bother explaining to Sasuke, that Naruto was a teacher, or that he had refused the position of Hokage. If Sasuke wanted to find that out he could ask Naruto himself. It might just give the both of them oppurtunity to resolve things.

Perhaps she was being foolish in imagining they ever could. The hate that Naruto had claimed so faithfully in his youth, and the burning hate Sakura had seen that morning in the hospital room- they were so completely different in nature.

Sakura watched Sasuke for a while, then sighed uncrossing her arms.

Sasuke -  
She wondered for a second if he flinched at his own name.  
He's very very, angry at you. I don't know what you did-

She gritted her teeth as he turned- looking entirely unconcerned.

But I promise you will get a /fair/ hearing.

That is to say - she added silently, leaving the room and its stoic occupant to wait - if you hurt him, I'll make sure you die.  
---------------------------------

Naruto's freedom was short lived. He had expected some sort of Hokage induced summons- what he /hadn't/ expected was to find the woman herself sitting regally at his kitchen table, flicking through a pile of scrolls with an expression of vague distaste.

She looked up and looked mildly irritated as Naruto sloped in- as if he was intruding on his own kitchen . She flicked the scrolls into a neat pile, and tapped one nail against her forehead.

Hello there Tsunade-baba!  
He grinned so sunnily he was surprised she could keep eye contact without wincing- but this was Tsunade, and she was used to it.

Sit down- I don't have all day.

Naruto obeyed, because he was tired, and he was planning to sit down anyway. He was in no way sulking. His headband was beside her elbow and he snatched it up before she could stop him.

How can I help you?  
Naruto fastened the headband simply to make him feel more comfortable, and as usual Tsunade got that slightly nostalgic look, as if she were imagining someone else in his place. It was gone in a matter of seconds and she was glaring again.

You're needed at a meeting this evening. I want to clear this bloody mess up once and for all.

She raised one eyebrow, and Naruto shrugged.

There is nothing to say.

Tsunade stood stiffly, and smoothed her shirt carefully.  
I will be the judge of that. And - don't call me old hag.

Naruto just made a face as she strode out, knowing full well that she could see.  
--------------------------

As he sat in his kitchen, he discovered that he was rather bored. To alleviate this, he started to tap his foot along to a catchy tune he had picked up that morning while he was teaching. And he tapped the counter melody with his fingers. And for the bass he substituted a hum. But he couldn't quite remember what the middle line was, and it was bothering him. So he went to the meeting- because Shikamaru would be there and Shikamaru would know.

It was the same sort of hushed silence, in the Hokage's office- that had hung there the day he had returned from the last battle of the war. The whole weight of the silence swung slowly on an axel just above the dark, bowed head of Uchiha Sasuke, sat at a desk facing the Hokage - his back to the door.

Am I late?  
Naruto offered, his innocent expression met with a venomous glare from both Tsunade and Sakura. There were only vague reactions from the other jounin; a flick of ash from Asuma's cigarette, an amused quirk in Kakashi's eyebrow. They knew to expect it. Sasuke- Sasuke didn't move, and Naruto was glad.

Thank you for bothering to attend.  
Tsunade offered drily, uncrossing her arms to flip over the scroll in front of her.  
Now his highness has arrived we can actually proceed.

She waved at the second seat, pulled in against the rable Sasuke sat at. Naruto paused.

It was true then- a hearing for Sasuke, on Orochimaru's death. Not a meeting then- the old hag had lied- this was a trial. And he was giving evidence. Naruto saw Sakura making a worried sort of face and sighed.

She expected him to argue- and he considered it. An argument might buy him an extra table, heck maybe even a partition wall so he didn't have to look the ugly bastard in the eye. But it wouldn't buy him any dignity. And suddenly, with Sasuke there, silently listening- his dignity became burningly important.

Ok. Here?  
He made a great show of pulling the seat out and sinking into it as if it were the most comfortable damned seat in the continent. Like it was his own armchair, in his own room. Across the room Sakura looked resigned, as if she recognised the mood he was in. Tsunade simply lifted her brush and gave him an expectant look.

Uzumaki Naruto.Hmm, take your age- divide by four, subtract the number of men you've slept with, multiply by the number of hairs on-

Tsunade coughed pointedly.

Naruto replied, sullenly. There was not a flicker from the man beside him, and Naruto didn't dare look. He didn't /dare/ look.

Thank you. Rank and occupation?

Naruto made a tsk noise deep in his throat and flattened one hand on the table in front of him. It was such an instinctively threatening pose, that nearly every ninja in the room, save perhaps Sakura and the hag, flickered their fingers towards the nearest hidden kunai. The nearest disguised shuriken.

Sasuke only exhaled, very slowly. Naruto didn't look.

Come on you old hag.  
He said quite pleasantly.  
You know all of this already-lets get on with it shall we?

Tsunade was silent for a while, her brush flickering across the form. She looked as if she considered continuing her pointless interview, but decided against it, flicking over to the next page.

Now. Can you explain in turn- /exactly/ what happened on the night of Orochimaru's death.

And that was when Naruto felt Sasuke flinch. At the name of an enemy long dead.

For a second Naruto allowed himself to look at Sakura, and cast her a silent apology. She wouldn't like what he was about to say. If he was lucky though, it would earn Sasuke the death he deserved.

We went to fight Orochimaru alone.

There were no challenges at all from the blank-faced jounin ranged around the room, so Naruto simply continued.

He was actually waiting for us, already injured from fighting Kabuto. There were three Akatsuki there, who were already dead. I still don't know where Kabuto went.

Perhaps, Naruto mused, Sasuke knew. The other man showed no signs of even having registered what Naruto was saying. Naruto didn't look.

Anyway, we fought, and we were losing quite considerably, simply because of the range and skill of Orochimaru's-  
He savoured saying it, feeling Sasuke flinch beside him,  
Of Orochimaru's jutsu.

Tsunade waved a hand and Naruto smirked to himself. He could say all of this and it wouldn't hurt, as long as he forgot it was him in this story- little 15 year old Naruto and his best friend.

I got some help from the Kyuubi, but by this stage Sasuke was feeling the effects of the cursed seal, due to /Orochimaru's/ proximity.

Sakura noticed Sasuke flinching that time, and she cast Naruto a reproachful look, as if to say- oh Naruto that is /cruel/.

He couldn't activate the seal without losing to Orochimaru, but he could barely hold back from using it either. Eventually he lost control, and the seal was activated.

Naruto stopped, just perhaps to savour the tension in the room. He remembered suddenly that that was the point where Orochimaru had laughed, and Naruto had hated him more than anything else in the world.

And he turned on me.

Kakashi looked the least surprised. He had seen how volatile Sasuke was around Naruto, and the potency of the cursed seal. Naruto all but nodded to him, wishing he could simply say I told you so,'

It was difficult, fighting the two of them. I knew that if pushed Sasuke could wear me down.  
He knew from experience.  
And I was very emotional. In the end though, the Kyuubi gave me-more power than ever before, and everything went a bit hazy. When I came to, Orochimaru was dead and Sasuke was back to normal.

Sasuke had been a little too happy, a little too relaxed, now Naruto really thought about it. He had slung a warm arm, two warm arms around Naruto's shoulders, and looked at him with strange drunk eyes.

We started to celebrate.

Sasuke had pressed his forehead against Naruto's and Naruto had laughed, like a huge shadow had lifted off his shoulders. He had thought about the Third, had had nearly cried.

Thinking back on it something was a little off, about Sasuke's behaviour.

Sasuke had been too close, and too warm, and far too soft.

He got close to me, then abruptly- just laughed, and performed a jutsu called Ten Part Seal- I only heard it vaguely. He drove his fingers on both hands onto the seal on my stomach and I passed out. It became apparant later that this forbidden jutsu had effected the Kyuubi's seal, weakening it and shortening its lifespan.

Naruto kept going, unaware that he had fisted his hands on the table.

When I woke up Sasuke was gone along with Orochimaru's body, and I returned to the village.

Naruto left it at that. The silence sank stiffly onto the room, the assembled jounin sharing a few unreadable looks. Sakura was pale, she at least, had picked up on what Naruto was implying. Tsunade spent a long time filling in her form then looked up at Sasuke.

Do you have anything you want to add to your earlier statement?

Naruto unclenched his hands and fixed his eyes on the ceiling, disinterested.

  
Sasuke's voice was deeper, and a lot rougher, still with that flat empty tone to it that Naruto recognised. He made a face and finally, turned round to look. And Konoha be damned, why was it that Sasuke looked almost the same?! Pale, pointed face and tousled dark hair- the sort of heart breaking looks that made woman sigh and Naruto angry deep down in his gut. Sasuke made everything about living look easy. He made giving evidence at his own trial for desertion and betrayal look easy.

Fine. The council will review the reports and deliver a verdict later this week.

Naruto stood and tucked his thumbs casually into his belt. The assembled jounin had begun to disperse, only Kakashi left, his one visible eye as unimpressed as usual.

Naruto, you can go now, Sakura, Sasuke- I need to talk to you.

Naruto tried very hard to read Tsunade's expression, but she kept her gaze uninterested, her head tilted down. He made an irritated sort of noise and turned for the door, raising one hand in farewell.  
----------

Sakura watched him go, unhappy sickness settling low in her stomach. For so long she had wanted to know, wanted to hear the reason behind this new, awkward Naruto. She had guessed it would be terrible, but she had never thought it would be like this. It was painful, in a heartwrenching sort of way. She could read it from the pauses between Naruto's words- those painful, icy pauses, that somehow seemed to express just how much it had hurt him.

And he shrugged it off like it had been nothing.

Oh Naruto, she thought, you idiot.

... He's changed.  
Sasuke stood slowly, the casual ease of his action contradicting the depth of the change he had just commented on. He seemed so unconcerned about everything; so carefully detached - it made Sakura angrier than she was relieved he was back.

Tsunade ignored his comment, instead banishing the scrolls with a flourish and a puff of smoke. They were replaced from beneath her palm, with a Konoha headband. Sakura could see the pale streak across the leaf emblem where the metal had been carefully filed down to hide a crack.

She remembered Naruto doing that, the headband balanced between his knees, lips pursed in concentration- sanding away a crack that he himself had made.

Sasuke will want it back.  
He had said, when she asked why.

If Sasuke noticed that it was his own headband, he didn't react. In the further corner of the office Kakashi shifted, leaning more comfortably against the wall. Sakura saw Sasuke glance in his direction and something unreadable flashed across his usually impassive features.

What was it that you wanted Hokage-sama?  
Sakura began, politely. Tsunade looked up and blinked.

Ah, yes.  
She lifted the headband so that it hung with the symbol catching the evening sunlight.  
I don't think I should give you this back, until the council have had the chance to review your case.

Sasuke tilted his head slightly, and Sakura stared resolutely at her feet. There was a heavy silence, until Kakashi straightened from his corner, and moved to stand by the Hokage.

I would think about it though.  
He said quietly, his gaze calm, unreadable.  
Do you have the right to return it to him?

Tsunade flinched, then flipped the headband into her grip and dropped her hands to the desk.

You're right.

Sakura saw the Hokage's thumg slide briefly over the rough, filed down scratch across the Konoha emblem.

We shall see.

The pause that followed was lighter, as if Tsunade had come to some decision already. Sasuke was looking out the window. There was the distant sound of children laughing, and the clang of some overworked mother calling her offspring by beating a pot with her wooden spoon.

  
Tsunade continued whisking the headband away and pulling out another scroll.  
I'm appointing you as Sasuke's guardian while his case is being reviewed.

There seemed to be no question on the matter, Tsunade signed the scroll with a flourish and handed it to Sakura, who took it, stiffly. Sasuke's only reaction was a tightening across his shoulders, which Sakura interpreted as discumfort.

You have to report to Sakura every morning, and any weapons training you want to do has to be supervised.

Again that shift of distaste, Sakura imagined that it was at the loss of freedom more than anything else. She had read about the initiation of missing-nin back into their villages, and it had mentioned often the difficulties they had living under the restrictions of a village without the fuel of community spirit. It would be hard for anyone to justify trapping themselves in rules and regulations when they did not share the love for the well being of their village.

She suddenly wondered, if that was what had happened to Naruto. Somewhere along the way he had lost his fire, his love for Konoha- his need to protect it with his life.

I understand.  
Sasuke murmured and Tsunade nodded, flipping her hand to dismiss them. Kakashi rose from his slouch by the Hokage's desk and went to the door, holding it open. Sasuke passed through it first and Sakura half expected Kakashi to do something stupid, like ruffle the other man's hair, or trip him up.

But Sasuke passed without incident. As she moved to leave though she felt Kakashi drop a hand heavily on her shoulder.

Keep him away from Naruto.  
He said loud enough that Sasuke could hear. His reaction surprised Sakura more than anything she had heard that evening. He stopped in his tracks, in the middle of the corridor, and turned his head so that one eye was visible over his shoulder.

His voice was flat and firm, his gaze hard. For some reason his reaction heartened Sakura. Sasuke did still care about something, even if that was simply hurting Naruto. She clenched her fists and made herself believe that it wasn't as simple as that.

Sasuke was never simple.

Apparantly Kakashi was expecting Sasuke to challenge his suggestion and simply crossed his arms and said nothing. His expression seemed to say, as you wish'.

And for the first time Sakura wondered how on earth she was going to manage it, with Sasuke on one side, with his dead, cold eyes, and Naruto on the other, the only thing keeping him human his hatred for the man he used to call his best friend.


	4. Chapter 4

Naruto is the property of Kishimoto.

Worth-Part 4

Iruka approached the class cautiously. Teachers in Konoha had always been divided in how they taught chakra control. He himself had always been a firm believer in a grounding in the theory before any practical application.

Naruto however was of the school of thought that chakra control was mostly learnt by instinct, and taught it by having his pupils mold chakra and use it to hurl clods of dirt at each other.

It made visiting his classes very difficult. The children were supposed to be throwing' the little balls of roughly molded dirt at each other, and catching' them. Once they mastered it with earth, they moved on to water. However the /instinctual/ chakra control that Naruto so believed in seemed to make the children hurl the mud about at high speed, or burn it, or cause it to explode over the entire class.

So everything was rather messy.

A remarkably dirt free Naruto negotiated his way around a solemnly concentrating Arakawa Miho, her clump of dirt hovering shakily around the level of her chin. He jogged over, barely holding in a wide grin.

Great class this year

Iruka blinked.

One of the little sods nearly knocked my eye out with their lump of dirt! It must have been going like twenty miles an hour.

Iruka had to forcibly restrain himself from stepping further away from the class of children and their furiously spinning handfuls of dirt.

That's great.  
He managed, rubbing his neck nervously.

What brings you here anyway  
Naruto asked, adjusting his headband. He seemed cheerful enough, but Iruka could sense a kind of tension in the blond, an itch to be fighting. It was a feeling that he remembered from long ago, when lack of missions, or his rivalry with Sasuke had made the blond frustrated and looking for an outlet.

Iruka liked to think that at one point he was rather good at reading Naruto.

Just wanted to see how you were doing.

Naruto, who was looking over at his class, seemed to pass into a dream for a moment, as if he were trapped in one thought for too long.

I'm fine Iruka-sensei.  
He said quietly, slipping back into an almost childish, wistful tone.

The class continued to hurl mud around, all save Miho who was shakily tossing her clump from side to side. Iruka could sense that already her control was very good, instinctively.

Outwardly, she seemed so like Sasuke, Iruka could see why Naruto was drawn to her. He wondered if Naruto could succeed where so many excellent teachers had failed - not in teaching her the skills of a ninja perfectly, she would master those easily, but instead teaching her the soul of a ninja, and the understanding of the bond she formed with her village.

He watched as she let her clump fall and turned to the boy beside her, his chubby face screwed up in frustration. She spoke to him, grabbing his hands and moving them around. It took Iruka a moment realise that she was helping him.

She's very good.  
Naruto said blankly. And then Iruka understood. A week ago, when Naruto had been living his life happily without Sasuke, he had been able to look at Miho and see her as a fresh start, someone he could give a chance. Now she was simply a reminder of too much pain.

I heard about  
Iruka began and Naruto flinched.

I don't want to talk about it.

Iruka new better than to argue. Instead he adopted a tactic of diversion that he had perfected over the last five years. He directed the topic just enough away from the subject of Sasuke that Naruto did not feel threatened, yet close enought that he could still touch on it.

Have you spoken to Sakura about it

Naruto made a thoughtful sound in his throat, his eyes still fixed on his grass. After a long, tense moment, he smiled and turned to face Iruka. He swept back his hair from his eyes, tangling long fingers almost anxiously in strands the colour of straw.

I should.

He didn't say he would, but it lightened Iruka's load of worry a little. Naruto was beyond his help now, but Sakura was a different matter. She still was able to get through to the blond, occasionally. 

Naruto-sensei! Iruka sensei

Both teachers turned to find the class in a circle, Miho in the centre, waving.

Look at this! Ready everyone

There was a strained sort of mutter from the children, but they waited for Miho, pudgy faces screwed up in extreme concentration.

Three, two, one- GO

There was a sudden pulse of wriggling chakra, and /almost/ in synch the class began to toss litte clods of earth around the circle. The chain of quivering soil continued fairly well for almost a minute, and Naruto was almost on the verge of congratulating them, when there was a pile up which rapidly turned into a panicked sort of frenzy with earth hurtling every which way.

Oh dear.  
Iruka said quietly, with a resigned sort of sigh.  
So much for innate chakra control. . .

He soon wished he could retract that statement, when Naruto turned to face him with a glitter in his eye that was vaguely reminiscent of Kakashi at his worst.

And actually, the mud-ruined uniform and loss of dignity in front of an entire class was worth it to hear Naruto laughing.

-

Sakura didn't come to visit Naruto often. His little flat was too empty and quiet to be any comfort to her, and he was fiercely protective of his private space. She wondered if it was something that he had inherited from the kyuubi- this territorial instinct, that was entirely unspoken.

Naruto never /acted/ like she was not welcome, she just felt out of place- like a rabbit in a fox's den.

But she had to go, because she hadn't been able to apologise yet, for everything she had contributed to this awful mess. She remembered distinctly telling Naruto to go and find Sasuke, and he had only refused her once.

She had been angry at him, for refusing to bring back the boy she loved, after he had been betrayed. It made her wince to think about it.

Oh hello Sakura-chan.  
He said wearily as he opened the door. His hair was completely wet and he was barefoot. The first thing Sakura could think of was what his skin might feel like- something to do with the way the neck of his t-shirt was low, and the way his ankles looked.

She looked up at his face and found that she had forgotten her well rehearsed speech. Forgetten in fact, what she had planned on saying entirely. What she wanted to say.

Why she even wanted to say it.

I eh- can I come in

He smiled and moved aside.

  
He began, grabbing a towl from the back of his sofa,  
I was in the shower. And then I lost the scroll and  
He trailed off, rummaging around under the sofa, before withdrawing a crumpled looking scroll.

It's fine.  
Sakura murmured, perching on his table.

I got caught up in a mud fight today and then I had to file a whole load of genin-class applications.  
He yawned, and Sakura heard his jaw crack. There was something so human about Naruto, about the way his body creaked and grumbled as much as anyone elses. She had spent an entire day with Sasuke, trailing behind as he hurled kunai into a treetrunk, as he molded chakra hour on hour. He had never looked human. She could never imagine him groaning or aching; rubbing his neck tiredly.

Sounds like an eventful day. Certainly more eventful than mine.

Naruto didn't respond immediately, instead sinking into a crosslegged position on the sofa and leaning back with a sigh.

I'm sure it was.  
He said eventually, then patted the sofa.  
Come sit here? I feel like I'm being interrogated when you sit like that.

Naruto had been interrogated enough recently, Sakura thought, sadly, and moved to sit beside him. He smelled of soap and noodles, and Sakura allowed herself to inhale it for a moment.

I'm sorry.  
She said, and he responded by stretching his arm over her and tucking her against his side. She felt him yawn again, and felt the warmth of his chest, rising and falling gently with each breath he took.

Not your fault.  
He added, through an even deeper yawn.

Sakura thought about Sasuke, fierce and dark and cold. And about betrayal, and inaftuation and friendship. She closed her eyes and leaned closer into the man beside her. Her eyes slid to his hand, casually resting across his flat stomach.

Is the seal giving you any bother  
She asked touching the back of his hand tentatively. He looked down at his stomach, and her hand, then lifted his t-shirt so that she could see where the seal had burned only a few days before. His skin was smooth around his navel , only marred slightly with a rough red spiral which she was sure would fade soon. Sakura found her fingertip tracing it without thought, and Naruto tilted his head back against the sofa restlessly.

It was very strange thinking that her touch still had an effect on him, when he seemed so impervious to everything else. Strange, and fascinating.

Experimentally, she eased her touch lower, to skin increasingly more sensitive. Naruto tossed his head to the side and she felt him snort into her hair, ruffling it with his rapid breath.

Oi, Sakura-chan.  
He murmured.  
Don't tease.

She pulled her hand back as if she had been burnt.  
I - Sorry.

When she looked up he was smiling good naturedly, and she sighed. How was it that some things Naruto understood perfectly, tolerated with this unfailing smile? How was it that he seemed to understand the intricacies of her strange attraction to him better than Sakura knew herself ? Yet other things, tiny things- his appearance, his lifestyle, when questioned on them, he would react with violence, and mad irrational anger.

I-I couldn't talk to him.  
It came from nowhere, and she half expected Naruto to pull away, to get angry.  
I wanted to ask him w-why, because I missed his statement, but

Naruto grunted and shifted beside her, but he seemed unusually relaxed.

Clammed up all day did he  
Another yawn, accompanied with a shiver that she felt under her cheek.  
You'd think you would get a chance spending all day with him.  
He said lightheartedly.  
I heard you are his new nanny, after all.

Sakura could find nothing to say to that, although she felt she had to reassure him of something. She decided to wrap an arm around his stomach again, and she felt him sigh.

I didn't ask forI know.  
He cut in, a little sharper.  
Please Sakura.  
He shifted again, and Sakura felt the restless power that flickered in him. It unsettled her, his shifting power, but she knew that he wouldn't hurt her. She wasn't Sasuke.

Mm. Ok.

She let herself tease the edge of his t-shirt again and he exhaled slowly through his nose, moving his hand up to her neck. She was just about to sit up and move closer, to do something- she had no idea what, just something, when-

Would you believe him  
He asked very quietly, brushing the edge of her ear with his fingertips. He sounded thoughtful, and sad.

If he was telling the truth.

It seemed to be a good enough answer, because he slid his fingers down her neck and raised his other hand to tilt her chin up. Sakura could see nothing his his clear blue eyes, nothing she could read.

Hmmm. Thinking about it makes me tired.  
He dropped his head down and she saw a curve in his lips that didn't seem like a smile. An unhappy, frustrated tilt.

If you let him get near me, I think I might kill him.  
His face was /so/ close. That strange excited flutter began inside of Sakura, the one that whispered about what was forbidden, and what was wrong.

  
She lied, and he kissed her, pushing her back into the sofa, encircling her with fierce arms and somehow managing to lift her hips and unfold her legs at the same time. He slid his hand down her neck to flatten on the ridge of her chest just between her breasts and she felt him pull at the zipper of her dress.

He sat up, paused, then stood up, pressing one hand against his forehead and turning sharply away.

Sakura sat up more slowly, fixing her clothes and her hair. She could see from where she sat that he was shaking.

I had better go.

He just nodded and rubbed his hair slowly, as if he were embarrassed to face her.

Don't - do anything stupid.  
Sakura added lamely, as she stood. That earned her a snort of laughter and a bow as he opened the door for her.

'Course not, Sakura-chan- sleep well.

Outside it was far too cold for the season, and Sakura felt oddly exposed without Naruto warm beside her.

-

Sasuke was using a blade, a long sword in a series of practised and decisive moves. It was a weapon Sakura had never seen him use before, and it made him seem like even more of a stranger, his dark hair too long, his clothes too drab.

She was supposed to be using the time to check mission reports, but the reading material was dry and uninspiring, and she could just hear Sasuke panting.

Where did you learn this

Sasuke stopped at her question and turned to stare at her for a long time.

I picked it up.  
He moved to sit beside her, swiftly cleaning the blade and sliding into a scratched leather sheath.  
I don't like it, I prefer throwing weapons.

Sakura knew what he meant, the life of a ninja was as much a mobile, working and modern life, as it was one steeped in tradition. A sword was less practical than a holster full of shuriken.

Why do you use it then

Sasuke grunted slightly in reply, and pulled out a scroll, battered and well read. Sakura watched him open it and read a few lines, and wondered if he planned on answering her question at all.

A throwing weapon is very little use against an enemy with a sword.  
He said suddenly eithout looking up.  
Sometimes, I like to fight on an equal footing.Like when you fought with Naruto.  
Sakura murmured under her breath. Sasuke raised his eyebrows, but still didn't look up.

He read quietly for some time, occasionally flipping his hand in a seal, or scribbling a note on the scroll. Sakura did a little work, but mostly she watched- because he still had that habit of moving his lips to the shape of every word he read, a childlike and fascinating thing.

I'm going to see him now.  
Sasuke said abruptly, interrupting her dream and shoving his scroll away inside his jacket. The sword was slung casually over a shoulder and he was already half standing before she could move. She lunged for him without thought.

His hand flew to his hip and Sakura had to flip backwards to avoid the first shuriken. The second she deflected with a hastily drawn kunai, and the third she managed to catch, just by her neck.

You can't.  
Sakura said, steadying herself, pulling on that control she had such pride in. She put the kunai away carefully.

Sasuke kept a fighting stance, one hand hovering by the sword handle. Sakura's eyes widened as they met his, and the wheel of the sharingan.

  
She hissed.  
If you want to kill me, why don't you just do it, and leave? Why did you allow us to /keep/ you here? Why did you stay

As her voice escalated Sasuke's face contorted and he brought his hand suddenly down, slamming his fist into some imaginary enemy.

You don't UNDERSTAND  
He almost howled it, and Sakura staggered back a step.  
You have no idea  
A kunai still glinted in his hand, and Sakura kept her fingers flickering over her shuriken holster.

I don't understand? I've NEVER UNDERSTOOD Sasuke! If you think so little of Konoha, of everyone in it -of ME- then why are you still hereBECAUSE NARUTO IS HERE  
Sasuke bellowed, hurling the kunai into the earth directly in front of her. There was a deathly silence.

Of course.  
Sakura muttered,  
Of /course/.

She straightened and dropped her hands to hang by her sides.

It's always Naruto. Isn't it

Sasuke blinked and straightened too, his face twisted and angry.

Is that what this is about? Jealousy? Just because you were fixated on me when we were childrSHUT UP  
Her screech echoed across the courtyard, disturbing a flock of birds resting in the curve of trees nearby.

How would you know anything about how I felt? You spent your time ignoring I existed completely! All your attention was focussed on making Naruto HURT as much as possible

For a moment she thought she had floored him. His dark eyes flickered and he straightened, very stiffly, expression clank and shocked. Then very quietly, cruelly, he began to laugh.

How dare you accuse me of hurting Naruto.  
When he spoke his voice was shaking. The crimson of the sharingan seemed even more harsh against his bloodless face, and his hands were tensely fisted by his sides.  
You spent your time following behind me as if I was some kind of prize to be won, and treated Naruto like the dirt beneath your feet

Sakura recoiled as if she had been slapped.

It- it wasn't like that

Her voice was almost a whisper, but Sasuke heard.

What was it like then  
His voice was still harsh, his mouth twisted viciously.  
It wasn't some pathetic race against all the other girls of the village to have me as some trophy boyfriend

Sakura shook her head, slumping back, almost stumbling.

It - it was - we were childrenI WAS A CHILD TOO  
He seemed unable to stop, two spots of red flushing his cheeks angrily, his hair rising with the static of his rising chakra.  
Did you not think that maybe I wanted to be wanted FOR MYSELF? Instead of a name; a DEAD NAMES-Sasuke. . .Did you never cease in your pathetic race to think for a moment that I might rather have you as a friend instead of someone who spent an hour simpering after my EVERY WORD.FUCK YOU  
Sakura finally found the words, stumbling right back from Sasuke. He was so different, yet so painfully the same. So disconnected, and out of place.

I WAS A CHILD  
She howled, and he blinked in shock, perhaps fixed to the spot by her anger alone.  
I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND ANY OF THAT CRAP! I didn't want some famous name and a chance to breed the next line of the Uchiha! I was a TEENAGE GIRL! I wanted a boyfriend- Someone to hold my hand and buy me chocolate! Someone cool and good looking and smartYou wanted a pretty face to show off to your friends, a  
He sounded weak, Sakura thought, weak against this frustration and ager that had been boiling inside her for years.

No Sasuke! I wanted YOU. I wanted your messy hair and your grumpy black eyes and your hands around my waist and just- time with you! And when it became painfully obvious that you weren't interested I just wanted you to- just

She was crying, she felt it running down her neck, and sticky under her eyes. Her lips tasted salty from her tears, and she wondered how long she had been crying for, exactly.

  
He asked quietly. When, Sakura wondered, had he got so close?

I- just wanted you to acknowledge it, I guess. To say'Hey, Sakura, I know how you feel, and I'm sorry I don't feel the same way.' I just wanted you to . . . see me there, like you always saw Naruto. . .

There was a very long, dead silence. Sakura was staring at her feet, but she could see Sasuke's toes, he was close enough

I didn't realise.  
He spoke eventually.  
You- must understand that I wasn't trying to 

God, she could hear him swallow, it sounded awkward and very, very human.

Hurt Naruto. Or you.I think I know that.  
Sakura said tiredly, she couldn't seem to raise her head and look at him.

Do you still

She sat down slowly and dropped her head into her hands. After a moments pause Sasuke copied her.

Now, I think I might -like you for a different reason.

She laughed, dully.

It's not as if you can bless me with an untainted clan now- and I doubt you will help me score any points with Ino. You're not as cool either

She thought of Sasuke cooly turning her down with his icy one liners, and it somehow didn't fit. Not since he had made such an awful mistake. He couldn't really be cool any more.

Oh thanks.  
His tone made her look up in surprise. She expected the dry sarcasm, but not the warmth behind his words.

It's true, though.  
She smiled, her cheeks raw from her tears.  
I wish we hadn't misunderstood each other.

Sasuke shifted closer, crosslegged, a very un-Sasuke pose.

I- me too.

Sakura's heart nearly stopped, because he had reached a hand out to push her hair back against her forehead. It was the first time he had ever touched her without a real reason.

I never disliked you.  
He said eventually, and she knew that was as close as she would ever get. And she thought of Naruto, restless in his messy little flat, and it felt like her heart was broken and scattered about.

I can't take you to see Naruto yet.

His fingers stayed by her forehead, pushing more tangled hair from the headband, his pinky touched her skin and Sakura shivered, almost ducking her head away.

I understand.  
He sounded curious, pressing his fingertips across the edge of her headband.

I'll talk to him- oh.

He had run his finger lightly, rapidly, down her cheek, eyes focused on her intently. She realised slowly that he was smudging the last of her tears away, as if it was another mission, to clear them from her face entirely.

I- never liked it when you cried.  
He said softly, and before Sakura could say anything he was standing, and moving, halfway across the courtyard, with his sword slung across his shoulder. She could only really watch him go, her fingertip hovering just above where his had been.


	5. Chapter 5

Naruto is the property of Kishimoto.

Worth- Part 5

Naruto hefted his scrolls and dropped them across Tsunade's desk, willy-nilly, nearly knocking her inkwell over.

  
She said, wrinkling her nose and lifting her nailpolish further from the desk,  
Are these

Naruto blinked.  
Genin application forms? You wanted to assess my class

The Hokage muttered to herself for a moment and then nodded, the nailpolish disappearing, replaced with a brush.  
I remember. I'll come down and see them this afternoon.

It was obviously a dismissal and Naruto turned to go, just managing to hide a smile. Tsunade always liked to act as if she wasn't bothered by the weight on her shoulders, as if Konoha was another gamble and she was keeping a poker face. But he knew, when he turned around to leave she was already leafing through the genin applications- already planning what to ask the youngsters.

It made him wonder. The way he felt about Konoha, and the almost painful rush he felt to protect it- was that how everyone else experienced loyalty? Duty? Maybe it didn't have to hurt like he had always felt it should. Embracing Konoha had always been very much like embracing an inferno. However much it hurt him, however much the population refused to acknowledge him- he gripped tighter, until he could never really let go.

It burned, but it was everything he loved.

When Sasuke had looked at him, dark eyes almost bored, and told him he would kill his brother- that was the same barbed, painful duty that he felt as he protected Konoha. In some ways he was and avenger too- avenging himself - by making his own sacrifice something that could be acknowledged. But as he walked through the busy corridors of the Hokage tower, watching all the faces of every happy ninja that passed, Naruto wondered if perhaps there was another way to experience loyalty.

An easier way, that was more simple and everyday, like the rising and setting of the sun, and the slow carve of the river smoothing a path of constant erosion, gradually marking the land with lines of age.

It scared him that he could have measured that all wrongly, that he could have been blind enough to lived surrounded by people who appeared simply to be living for themselves, yet inwardly, regardless of how lowly their jobs may be, they were part of everything that made Konoha. Inwardly they loved their village as if it were their family.

A long time he had understood that. When had he changed?

Naruto felt unsettled as he left the building, watching the ninjas and ordinary villages crisscrossing the dusty streets, all full of their own little purpose, the everyday tasks that held the village together.

It was all very easy to be a hero, surrounded by people to help you and cheer you on, he thought, wistfully. Sometimes Naruto wondered if the hardest thing was to be normal. Everyone supported the hero, but who supported the baker? Or for that matter, the owner of the ramen shop?

And actually, Naruto thought, ducking under the flaps of Ichiraku ramen, he would rather own a ramen stall than be a hero. Who wouldn't?

He was so distracted by his musings that he didn't see Sasuke eating at the counter until he had already ordered. Otherwise he would have left before the other man had a chance to look up, and fix him with that dark expression He would have left, and made do with instant ramen at home.

But he had ordered, and he would be damned if he let Sasuke stop him from eating his favourite food, at his favourite seat.

Naruto said nothing as his ramen arrived, and nothing as he ate it. He could actually hear Sasuke eating; little slurps and swallows, and the sound of his chopsticks against the bowl. It was somehow fascinating, yet also repulsive. Naruto kept his eyes carefully on the counter before him, on his hands as he paid, on his feet as he stood. When he left, Sasuke followed.

The other man followed just behind him, almost by his side. They walked at a leisurely pace, and Naruto was surprised by how familiar it all felt, how easy it was still to fall into stride with Sasuke.

He had kept the habit of walking with his hands in his pockets.

Naruto hated it; hated him for being the same as always- for acting as if nothing mattered. As if he could waltz back into Konoha and get the pardon he didn't deserve.

But the streets were busy and cheerful, lanterns already glowing against the failing light. No-one could see any of Naruto's thoughts, no-one could feel any of his pain- and he wondered if he was selfish protecting Konoha from Sasuke, if it wanted him so much.

He kept silent though, ducking his head so as not to meet anyone's eyes. To the passers by he supposed they looked like two friends, taking a quiet walk home. Two /good/ friends. It was an irony he didn't appreciate. And when they left the centre of the village and reached the darker, quieter residential streets he stopped, because Sasuke's quiet, close scrutiny made him so uncomfortable- so /angry/.

He felt that desire again, the one he could never quite believe was his own- the desire to hurt. To hurt Sasuke so much that his heart stopped with the pain, that his last thoughts were a jumbled and frenzied mess of madness.

WHAT DO YOU WANT  
Naruto howled, turning to face Sasuke and let him see how angry he really was. To let him see those bloody monster's red eyes, and /feel/ the pain of the anger. The /intent/. It was the first time Naruto had ever let Sasuke see that hate, and it didn't make him feel any better.

Sasuke flinched, but stayed put, maybe five feet away, his hand still shoved in his pockets. The casual pose only served to fuel Naruto's anger and frustration.

You BASTARD! WHAT IS IT THAT YOU'RE HERE FOR

For a split second, an expression Naruto had never seen before flitted across Sasuke's face. His lips twisted, his eyelids dropped- and for amoment he looked hopeless, lost. When he spoke his voice was so low and faint that at first Naruto thought he hadn't heard.

I missed you.

Naruto thought he might break. What in all hell did tha bastard think he was doing! How could he say such an empty thing faced with such hate? How could he stand there- as if Naruto would open his arms and welcome him back - as if all he had done was borrowed Naruto's kunai and forgotten to give it back!

Naruto wanted to say a million things- a million barbed and hateful things, to crush that hopeless look on Sasuke's dark face. To push him away, so far away that he could never say such a stupid little thing again.

But for some reason he was frozen, his stomach lurching against his rapidly pattering heart- fixed to the spot until he gathered enough strength to turn and walk away.

Sasuke didn't try to stop him.

-

Later on when Naruto was home, and settled, only one part of the argument rang in his memory. All he could think of, fix his mind on- as he had a long shower, as he filled out his scrolls - were those three little words, spoken with such a strange, wistful, unlikely tone.

I missed you.

Sasuke had said. Sitting there with cold tea at his elbow, and a pile of scrolls on his knee, Naruto thought he maybe missed himself as well.

-

Sakura was running late. Her sleep had been filled with unsettling dreams, with Naruto tugging on one side, his fingers tangled in her hair, and Sasuke pulling her to the other with a dark, unreadable stare.

A stare, and one finger pushing her fringe back.

She barely had time to brush her hair, and she staggered out of her flat with a pile of scrolls and a hair tie between her teeth. It was difficult to concentrate on anything else though, because she felt so painfully stretched. When she had first been placed in team seven, her emotions had been so simple- happiness to be with Sasuke, irritation at being put with Naruto. If she had known then how complicated that would become - she probably would have handed in her notice that very day.

It was a complicated, time-tangled mess of emotions forced into the simple moud of her childhood feelings. Naruto still frustrated her, drove her round the bend with his stupid confusing moods and infuriating, out-of-character calm. And Sasuke still fascinated her, with his hopeless sad eyes, and the feeling she got- that somehow he wasn't telling her everything. That he was totally innocent, but somehow couldn't say.

Yet there was so much more to it than that. She loved Naruto more than she dared admit to, but she didn't want to imagine /wanting/ him. She knew it might be just there, under a surface she couldn't bring herself to scratch. She was afraid of him as well, not of hurting her, but of hurting himself. She was afraid that he would continue to drag himself on through this very gradual self destruction.

That he would die an old man and no-one would recognise it for what it actually was; a slow and steady suicide.

Sakura couldn't start worryiong about how she felt about Sasuke, because he was waiting for her on the steps of the Hokage tower, wearing a bashful look. His lips were twisted in what might have been a smile before he pulled it back- and his eyes were staring fixedly at his feet.

Sakura imagined that if she tapped him on the shoulder right then, she might lose an arm.

Hello. Sorry I'm late.

His head jerked up and he fixed her with a vague, glassy eyed look.

It's ok.

Sasuke was staring at her so fixedly, Sakura had to flatten her hair and straighten her dress.

What is it

He dropped down from the steps and adjusted his jacket slightly, sweeping back his dark hair to gaze at her again, lips twisted once in that repressed, wry little smile.

Oh, it just looks as if you fell out of your bed and onto the street.

Had it been Naruto, Sakura would have answered that with a glare and a swift slap. Sasuke however, was faced with a blank stare, which very quickly developed into flustered embarrassment.

Come on.  
Sakura mumbled, fixing her headband and bustling off into the tower. She didn't bother checking to see if he followed, she could almost feel him laughing at her, even if he was silent.

As the morning went on, Sasuke doing his usual drill of shuriken and taijutsu practise, the elegant balance of his blade routine- Sakura got the feeling that something was out of balance.

Occasionally, Sasuke would simply stop and stare at the row of Kunai he had just hurled into the training logs. Stare as if they would give an answer to some terribly important question. As if they held all of the world's mysteries.

He would direct a dark glare at his feet, and remain that way, eyes flickering as if his thoughts were racing faster and faster only to stop abruptly, blinking - and resume his training.

Sakura fluttered one of her scrolls to catch his attention, bringing him to kneel beside her, expression as bland as normal.

But Sakura wasn't so afraid of that blank, bored look anymore. She had seen a little bit beyond it, and she was fairly sure it was completely constructed.

What is wrong? You've been distracted all morning.

Sasuke seriously looked as if he was considering lying. His dark brows flickered down and he opened his mouth-

I saw Naruto yesterday. I spoke to him.

Sakura felt her stomach lurch uncomfortably. She hadn't heard of any disasters, any explosions- could it be that the inevitable hadn't happened?

He- hates me.  
Sasuke added, looking suddenly completedly empty. He seemed hollow then, with nothing to keep him from being blown away in the wind, from turning into dust and shadows.

Well, he thinks- believes  
She amended, carefully- tryingto keep her tone as neutral as she could with her voice shaking like that.  
That you betrayed him.

Sasuke flinched.  
I did.  
He whispered, pressing his fists against the ground.  
I wasn't strong- enough to stop- I just.. .

Sakura could only just hold her breath, her lips still parted , frozen by his words, and by what they might shape.

I wanted to- I still wanted to beat him and it . ... at the very end I couldn't keep it out.

He stared unhappily at his hands.

  
Sakura couldn't keep the urgency out of her voice, all her lessons on gentle interrogation gone, wiped away by some shapeless, fearful hope.

His VOICE! God, all I could hear was his voice, telling me I was worthless and hateful and... I just wished that maybe if I came back and played the perfect ninja Naruto might

Anguish, it was painted along every line of his face, and the twisted darkness of his eyes. Sakura didn't know who Sasuke was, sometimes. But Naruto always had known. Would Naruto know this?

Naruto might what  
She whispered.

He might forgive me. ...

He shook his head.

But I realise- I mean, I was wrong, even if it was Or-Orochimaru using me as a vessel- I should have been stronger. Even if Konoha forgives me- Naruto never will.

When he looked up again his expression was resigned, bland. Sakura couldn't speak for a long time, her words all tangled and misplaced somewhere in her thoughts. She didn't know whether she understood it right at all, but-

Orochimaru possessed you

Sasuke stared at her blankly.

Yes. But I should have been able to

Sakura dropped her head down onto her hands and gasped, as if by pulling in more air, she might be able to clear herself of this horrible burning hope.

She managed eventually, sitting back up. Sasuke was expretionless, and it made her feel weak. There was no way around this. Sasuke could think of nothing but Naruto, and his forgiveness. Naruto could think of nothing but Sasuke, and his enforced hatred of him. They would circle each other forever, hurting and being hurt, until there was nothing left between them that was anything.

It made her feel helpless, the scale of their confusion, the sheer mass of their irreparably tangled feelings. She wondered if she even had a place there at all. All that Sasuke saw now was Naruto. She imagined that even then as he stood and unsheathed his sword, he was imagining Naruto with him, whether it be as a training partner or an opponent.

He was imagining what Naruto's blood would look like on the flat that sword, or perhaps his breath clouding it.

Sakura would never feature, not with Sasuke. And she was fading from Naruto too, just another snarl in his tangled life, a life he was trying so hard to distance himself from.

But it didn't matter, she thought desperately, because even if it meant she would be excluded completely, she would try her best to fix them. Because it was unbearable otherwise.

She felt, as she watched Sasuke wrroy through his exercises, still obviously distracted- that hopelessness was the most painful thing a ninja could feel.

Naruto stalked the hallways of the Hokage tower, a little like some caged wild cat, filling every empty room with a restless, tight feeling.

His thoughts were trapped as well, all spiralling around Sasuke's words the night before, his stupid empty little words.

I missed you.

What a pointless thing to say! Everyone missed their childhood! How was Sasuke expressing that, relevant at all to Naruto himself? He missed team seven too after all; missed Kakashi being late, rescuing lost cats, and doing silly childish things.

He missed twelve year old Sasuke, who fell for stupid tricks like hidden clones and last minute kawarimi no jutsu, yet was brilliant enough to fight jounin level ninjas on an equal footing. He missed the bastard's stupid one word answers, and his childish embarrassment at something as simple as asking for help.

But that was a completely different Sasuke to the man he was faced with now; how would telling him he missed /that/ Sasuke help in any way?

It hurt to think about it, but Naruto was feeling morbid. He had found an open wound; and perhaps it was just the events of the last week, but he felt like aggravating it.

What exactly /was/ it about Sasuke? There were plenty of other brilliant ninjas who would have filled the role of rival just as well. On paper Rock Lee was much more of a threat, with his repeated advances on Sakura.

But, it was something else, that neither Lee, nor Neji, nor any of the other ninjas had- this /pull- this unmeasurable force, dragging him towards Sasuke. It was his eyes maybe, or his wrists, and the way he was so graceful at /everything/.

Sasuke had been as different from Naruto as he could be. That was what was so beautifully, terrifyingly fascinating- and Naruto couldn't resist it. Not even now, with Sasuke as his enemy.

Naruto curled his hands into fists so sharply that his nails dug into his palm. He had to force his thoughts away from Sasuke, and push them somewhere else, somewhere safe. Sakura- she was in the building somewhere, he knew, probably finishing up in one of the offices.

It wouldn't take himlong to find her, Naruto decided, thinking instead of her face, her smile. He hurried along the corridors and up the stairs, until he found the right room, the door already half open and casting a strip of sunset across the wooden floor.

Sakura was turned away from Naruto and he thought that she looked very beautiful like that, with the light curving along her arm and making her hair seem darker that it actually was.

He crossed the room and she tilted her head and sighed, without turning to face him.  
  
Her voice was low, and as he peered at her face, vaguely reflected in the window, he saw the stubborn frown knitting her eyebrows and was hit with one of his impulsive desires to hold her.

So he did. She only struggled a little, relaxing instead to drop her head against his chest. He knew Sakura was physically as strong as he was, perhaps stronger. But he had another kind of power over her, the strength of experience shared, a kind of trade. She put up with him, and he stayed around to keep her memories going.

Naruto sometimes wished their reasons were more romantic than that.

What is wrong with you  
She mumbled, making no attempt to move. Her chin jutted into his breastbone and her breath was warm and damp through the thin stretch of his t-shirt.

She shook her head and tilted her head up, he imagined, to glare at him. But before she could manage he leaned down and kissed her, a thoughtful, empty little kiss which she only vaguely returned. She let him kiss her for a while, and Naruto thought about it, and why he was doing it. It felt nice, and it pulled her a little bit closer to him. Ever since- since Sasuke had returned, Sakura had been floating away.

It won't quite work.  
Was what she said when he pulled back. Naruto gave a good natured sort of shrug, his arms still cruved around her, and lowered his eyes.

Well, yes I know.

Sakura sighed unhappily.

It won't work without him and you know it. We- never had a partnership Naruto- always a threesome.

Naruto thought about it. Sakura, the girl he was hot for, his girl, the babe. She was the thinker, the tactician- what she lacked in pure violent talent, or understanding, she made up for in guts, and quick thinking. She had been one half of what had driven Naruto out of bed every morning to meet his group, one half of what had driven him to pull on chakra that wasn't his own .

Yet she had only been half. On her own she was less of a challenge. She wasn't going to push him that next half, that had been Sasuke's job. A rival and a girl, it was the most basic recipe for any story.

And Naruto knew that he couldn't carry on with /his/ story without Sasuke playing some sort of role. He knew that. He hated it. The role that Sasuke would play- he wanted to make sure it would be as an enemy.

Why don't you want to forgive him

There was a thoughtful silence that seemed to reflect the quality of the light, a slow sunset glow that barely managed to fill the room, seeping across Naruto's golden hair, across Sakura's eyes.

It's not that. I don't think I can forgive him.  
Naruto managed eventually. Sakura had taken the zipper of his vest with her fingertips and was flipping it carefully back and forth.

  
Her tone was sharper than before.  
What are you afraid of

Naruto laughed. When he tilted her head up and kissed her again she kissed back as if to say- look, I'm complying, please tell me. He pressed a thumb on her chin, then along the soft curve on her bottom lip.

Sometimes, when I do this.  
Sakura met his eyes and he was smiling hopelessly.  
Or when I think about doing this  
He amended, punctuating the phrase with a kiss.  
I'm thinking about Sasuke as well.

Sakura released a soft oh' of understanding, and let her shoulders relax. Naruto let her go and shoved his hands roughly into his pockets.

I can't forgive him. And it won't work.

She didn't respond, turning back to the window. Naruto nodded to himself, and made to leave, trying to open the door as silently as possible, trying not to break the calm of the room.

He paused with his hand on the doorframe.

Could you maybe try? Just try? Please.

For a moment, Naruto considered getting angry. It would be so easy- anger was something he could easily pluck from the frustration he felt about Sasuke. Instead, he thought about it. About trying to talk to Sasuke. About hearing his side of the story. About forgiveness.

Sakura let him go.


	6. Chapter 6

Naruto is the property of Kishimoto.

Worth- Part 6

The weather was a little colder than usual the next morning, the sun seeming a little far away, and the cold light it cast, watery. Naruto was only ten minutes or so late, but he was beyond worrying. He was too confused, and too tired.

The class was already gathered, under the cluster of trees on the far edge of the courtyard- and as Naruto approached he could see a dark figure crounched among them.

Sasuke.

The other man was sitting cross legged, his dark head bowed. He seemed to be addressing the class; and every little ragged head was tilted, listening attentively.

Naruto waited for the anger, the burning, hateful protectiveness, but it never came. He was left with a slightly scared, wistful sort of feeling, that fluttered delicately in his stomach and made him approach carefully, so that no-one in the little class could see him.

He wanted to know- he wanted to see, what Sasuke was like, whether there might be something there that remained from before; a remnant of the old Sasuke.

And Naruto realised what that strange, unsettling feeling was; something he hadn't felt in the longest time. Hope.

-How many of you here want to try a mission

Sasuke was saying, his chin resting on his clasped hands, in such a fmiliar pose. The class responded with a fluttering of raised hands, and a chorus of affirmatives.

You do? So  
Sasuke spoke quietly to them, and his voice was never forced. It seemed as if he was talking to them as an equal, not a teacher, or a superior.  
I suppose you all want to be come genin-class ninjas

Another chorus of replies.

I wanna be a /chuunin! Like Mommy  
One girl cried out, and the class seemed to agree.  


Sasuke waited for the excitement to die down then tilted his head.  
Just Chuunin? None of you want to be Jounin

There was a more puzzled silence, but a few heads nodded. Naruto noticed Miho shaking hers though, in the same way that she always did when she disagreed with a teacher. Sure enough her hand was soon raised.

Naruto-sensei says we should live each day as it comes and not set our sights too high

She piped out, her dark gaze challenging. It was fascinating, the reflections between her posture and Sasuke's.

He did  
Sasuke said, sounding genuinely surprised.  
Well- I think I have to say- Naruto-sensei is wrong there.

Naruto shook his head to himself. No, no Sasuke, he thought, don't do this to them. Don't tie them to a destiny they can't fulfil. Ambition was a curse that was too heavy to bear.

What do you mean

Sasuke dropped his gaze for a moment then began talking, in a gentler voice, as if he were remembering something.

I had a best friend. He wasn't like you at all. Every day, a hundred times or more he would tell me- tell everyone: the guy at the ramen stand, the teachers, his other friends, people on the street- the Hokage

There was a muted murmur at that.

He would tell them all/exactly/ what his dream was. And it wasn't a small, average sort of dream- like being a chuunin. His dream was huge. He wanted to be the Hokage

The class was struck dumb. Naruto watched the little faces as they struggled to comprehend such a dream.

D-did he become Hokage  
One little girl asked, worrying her skirt nervously with her little fingers. Naruto held his breath.

Not yet.  
Sasuke said with a smile.  
But there has to be a 6th Hokage soon, doesn't there

It seemed to be enough to settle the rest of the class, but Miho still seemed unconvinced. Naruto couldn't bear any more though- it felt too strange to see Sasuke like that, who; with words simple enough for six year olds to understand, had uprooted something that scared Naruto more than anything in the world.

  
He remembered how much he had detested the way Kakashi could appear as if from nowhere at the start of lessons, and savoured doing it then, and watching the children jump nervously at his approach.

Sasuke just turned his head calmly, before standing and brushing himself free of dust carefully. Naruto watched him, and tried to feel angry.

That's enough bothering Uchiha-san, don't you think

He gathered the class away from Sasuke, herding them towards the school building.

You have a test today with Iruka-sensei, did you forget

There was a chorus of groans, but the majority of the class traipsed off in the direction of the school. Only Miho remained behind, tugging slightly on the hem of Naruto's vest.

  
She began, dark features thoughtful,  
Is... Uchiha-san right? About wanting to be Hokage

Naruto crouched down, and faced her, trying his hardest not to look panicked. He didn't know what to say- had it been yesterday, maybe he would have laughed and ruffled her hair, promised her she didn't have to set her hopes too high. But he wasn't sure himself anymore. If you could- if you had the potential- why shouldn't you dream. Just because his own dreams had been corrupted-

  
Naruto grinned.  
If you think you're good enough, then why not

Miho opened her mouth, but Naruto stopped her with a finger to her lips and one raised eyebrow.

But you've got to stick with it, and /never/ let it go

He saw her jaw set and her eyes drop in determination. Maybe he wasn't being fair by stopping them from dreaming- but how was it fair pushing his own on them as well? In the end, this was the age where they made up their minds, and he could only hope he had done the right thing.

He watched her go, and felt oddly happy, as if he had found something that he had lost a long time ago.

Turning back, he found Sasuke perched on the old swing, looking uncharcteristically apprehensive. His fingers were laced and his elbows resting on his knees, in a casual pose that was as tense as it was arranged.

And Naruto thought, how could he walk away from him now?

He walked over, shoving his hands stiffly in his pockets, when he reached the swing, he turned his head and nodded slightly.

Let's go then.

He waited for Sasuke to stand before he walked away.

-

Naruto didn't quite know where he was going. He was headed out of Konoha, he knew /that/. The village wasn't the right place, somehow. It weighed to heavily on his conscience, and it was easy to tell Sasuke felt awkward there.

Outside of town, the air was even cooler, and Naruto found himself envying Sasuke his longsleeved coat. It was bizarre to think of such a mundane thing under such tense conditions. Naruto had always found it easier to measure his discomfort on a purely physical level first.

After some time, he stopped, at the wooden bridge he had crossed so many times- to go on missions after mission. Always coming back. He wondered what it had been like for Sasuke, never expecting to cross that bridge again.

Shut up. Be quiet for a moment. I want to think.

Sasuke moved to stand opposite him, shifting nervously. It was really disconcerting for Naruto, watching the other man fidget like that, and it only confused him further, until his racing thoughts were impossible to keep track of. Somehow his duty had taken a twisting change, and instead of protecting Konoha from Sasuke, he seemed be duty-bound to /forgive/ him.

It was Sakura really, and her sad, tired face, tilted so the sunset could paint it back to life. She was tangled up in his thoughts as well, and he knew that she wanted him to forgive Sasuke. Had it been anyone else, Naruto would have been able to disregard their feelings, as something irrelevant to his decision. But Sakura was painfully relevant, and always would be, when it came to Sasuke.

When he looked at the other man's face, he thought of Sakura first, and he felt sad.

What was it like  
The words came from nowhere, and Sasuke responded with, at first, a look of puzzlement, and then by dropping his head.

It- was like. . . drowning.

He didn't elaborate, but Naruto knew what he meant. When he let the kyuubi loose, it was like a whirlwind under his skin, and sometimes he felt like he was struggling to tread water above it. It wasn't the chakra he culdn't control, rather the consciousness of the monster. No matter how powerful the seal was, when his feelings and the feelings of the kyuubi sang a chord together, there was very little he could do to stop himself.

He imagined that without his feelings ringing in sympathy, and the Kyuubi in control, he would feel like he was drowning, pulled away from himself, no longer given any choice in his actions.

After- I felt like I was going to be sick until I died.

Sasuke looked away to the side. He was remembering hours of pathetic, empty retching, coughing bloody bile onto the forest floor. He had wanted to die, wanted to lie down beside Naruto and join him.

The sickest feeling, had been that Orochimaru had died satrisfied- he had /felt/ it.

And he hadn't just left that /feeling/ inside Sasuke. Inadvertantly, or on purpose, he had left the memory of countless disgusting, shameful acts, and the cruel jutsu he had sculpted from them. Sasuke thought that then he had probably gone mad; because he couldn't remember running away- only collapsing afterwards. He swallowed down a sudden wave of nausea, watching Naruto, and waiting for a response.

I wish you had.

He didn't look like he meant it though, in fact, guarded as his blue eyes were, Sasuke thought maybe he caught a tiny glint of something like regret.

The other man raised a hand, warning Sasuke from trying to move towards him. Sasuke ignored him, and took a total of three steps before he was back-handed so hard his head snapped right round to the left, and his eardrum rang like a whistle bursting. He snorted and blood spattered on the bridge beneath him.

The silence was heavy, interrupted only by the brief splat of Sasuke's blood on the bridge, and the popping of Naruto's chakra, bubbling around his hands.

Naruto lunged first.

Sasuke dodged Naruto's fist, jumping straight back to plant one foot on the edge of the bridge and launch himself up. As Naruto's chakra boiled further into his limbs- bleeding crimson into his eyes, he became faster, twisting in mid air to sweep round with a kick that only just missed.

The build up of chakra went straight to Sasuke's head. He could hear his blood drumming in his ears, and his own anger fed from Naruto's, the emotions of the two men thrumming in sympathy. They fought faster than Sasuke had ever done before, an elaborate dance of thrusting kicks and balance lost and caught.

Sasuke was faster, perhaps, twisting and dodging enough to miss every strike Naruto aimed at him. But for every blow Sasuke himself landed, Naruto seemed completely unafftected, the chakra saturated punches glancing off the sheild of boiling red around him.

Sasuke could breath it in, the power of the kyuubi.- he could feel it scalding his knuckles, and the hairs on his neck bristled with the inhuman, monstrous anger of the beast. The sharingan span in his eyes as he raced to take it all in- frames of boiling movement, Naruto everywhere at once.

He was so immensely powerful, enough to push the breath from Sasuke's lungs. It hurt, and yet it didn't, because Sasuke almost felt welcome within the cradle of the kyuubi's hatred. Naruto moved so fast, that even with the sharingan he seemed like a blur- finally landing a kick on Sasuke that threw him from the bridge to skid to a halt on the river, the chakra in his feet boiling the water. He barely had a chance to breath before Naruto was on him again, swiping for a hold then ducking to sweep his leg round in a kick- missing as Sasuke twisted to the side and landed one of his own. They were both silent, save for the howling of chakra, and Naruto's face was twisted into a painful, hate filled grimace.

He skidded back and a grin flitted across his face, the red eyes of the kyuubi looking almost /pleased/. Sasuke understood. He had never felt better than when he was fighting Naruto- when he was pitted against that power, and anger. Perhaps this was what all the teasing and goading was meant to lead to. Destruction, of themselves- of each other.

Naruto opened a palm, in that familiar, oddly peacemaking gesture. Sasuke didn't even attempt to hide his fascination as he watched the chakra spiral there- blood red, twisting into a spinning ball that just grew and grew, making the air around it whistle eerily.

Rasengan. There was no way to avoid it, not now- and Sasuke could only do one thing. He formed the seals faster than he could see, muscle memory doing all the work for him. Palm down, grabbing his wrist- and-

Even as he felt the chakra thunder into his hand, even as he saw Naruto running towards him. Even as the kyuubi's chakra grew too strong, the air almost too thick to breath- he panicked.

The word choked in his throat, the chakra pulsed suddenly away, drained helplessly from shaking limbs. Sasuke couldn't blink, because he had seen his hand fisted in Naruto's chest, and seen the blood sliding down to his elbow. He had felt theother man's heart beat its last between his fingers.

He didn't want to do that again. He didn't want to do /any/ of that again!

He couldn't move.

-

Naruto was lost. The Kyuubi was angry- and he was too confused to stop himself. Anger was the easiest emotion to summon, hatred the simplest feeling. His frustration fuelled his chakra, and he felt he wasn't just going to destroy Sasuke- he was going to destroy everything. Incinerate the world with his anger.

Destory himself as well- burn up with his home and his friends, nothing to lose, nowhere to go.

But Sasuke had stopped; frozen dead, white faced, in his tracks - and Naruto was hauled back from the fire like a dog on a chain. He forced the rasengan down past his feet, boiling away the water in the river, spitting sulphuric steam around them both. Naruto and Sasuke. Best friends, worst enemies.

At first Naruto couldn't see at all. The other man had bowed his head, and his shaking hand was still palm down between his knees, as if he couldn't dare move it from where the chidori had been.

As he got closer though, he heard tiny gasps, as if Sasuke couldn't breath, his shoulders shaking with the effort. Naruto expected an attack, or some sort of warning as he took a further step towards the other man, but Sasuke didn't move.

There was a splatter of liquid hitting the hissing water beneath Sasuke's feet, but it wasn't blood. The world upended itself, and Naruto almost stumbled as he saw Sasuke's face. He was paler than white, dark smudges around his wide black eyes, blood smeared from his nose. Interrupting the drying blood were the twin pale tracks of tears, streaking his cheeks raw, and clumping his dark lashes together.

Naruto took another, shaky step, and raised his hands. Sasuke flinched, but barely moved, just clenching his extended hand into a tight fist- fighting hopelessly against the way his limbs were shivering. The tears kept falling, and Naruto wondered if he even realised he was crying.

Naruto couldn't think of anything else, only the raw red rims of Sasuke's eyes, and his painfully clenched shoulders. When had it stopped being a battle and turned into a fight? They used to have so much meaning behind every scuffle- a kind of symbolic righteousness that weighed every punch. But Naruto had forgotten about his duty while he was fighting Sasuke, he had forgotten about /everything/ but the other man.

Maybe, a fight wasn't the right way to mend the rift between them.

The thought scared Naruto. He didn't really know what else to do with Sasuke- with his shaky gasping breaths, and his wide black eyes. They had never been particularily good at talking, even before- before. . . Naruto could barely remember what had happened to make him so angry. It seemed slightly insignificant now, with Sasuke crying, and steam floating in the cracked hollow where he had hurled the rasengan.

Sasuke was talking to himself, eyes fixed on Naruto's hands hovering between them. Through the dying spit and steam of boiling water, the sun was still shining in that distant, watery way.

Naruto took Sasuke's wrists in his hands, feeling suddenly desperate. He gripped so tightly that Sasuke flinched again, jerking his head back. His hair fell away from his pale face entirely, and without it sheltering his eyes, he seemed frighteningly exposed, vulnerable. His wrists were so thin too- just bone and tensely flexing muscle. Sinew and tendons, pulled tight against Naruto's fingertips. Naruto tightened his grip- squeezing, and Sasuke gasped, his mouth falling open, and a flicker of defiance starting in his eyes.

Naruto kissed him. He could do nothing else, his mind was far too lost in his own confused reasoning, and frantic plans- too suddenly shattered by that tiny gasp, and that whisper of anger, still under the surface. He trapped Sasuke's wrists against his chest and pushed up against the other man, so that Sasuke's head was painfully tilted back, lips roughly parted by his tongue.

Sasuke was kissing back, though- wet and hot; his wrists and hands flexing against Naruto's chest. The weak shivering was gone, replaced by shaking of a different kind- the shiver of something barely repressed, something wild, and hungry. Naruto felt like he was devouring Sasuke, his greedy tongue swallowing up every muffled gasp- his grip keeping the other man flush against him.

Then suddenly they were thigh deep in icy water- Sasuke almost collapsing on weak knees into the river. Maybe his chakra had run out, or perhaps he had just forgotton to keep channeling it to his feet like Naruto had- but it made little difference. Naruto simply freed one of Sasuke's hands to grab at his jacket instead, holding him up against the current and kissing him harder.

Sasuke was quick to respond, grabbing a handful of Naruto's sweat soaked hair and pushing into the kiss, as if it were another sort of battle. They stood like that for a long time, needy, wet mouths thrust together, gripped white-knuckle tight to each other, trapped.

Sasuke pulled away first, gasping, face dropped down against Naruto's shoulder. It was all right, Naruto thought, panting. He could see from the slow, dark, burn in the other man's eyes, that he would be back for more.

Sasuke took a step back, heavily through the water, towards the bank. Naruto followed him, because thinking about it, kissing on land was a better idea. Halfway there however, they got tangled in another embrace, Sasuke- both arms now free- grabbing Naruto desperately around the neck. They fell, half on the bank, half in the river, and Naruto had to haul himself /and/ Sasuke out, his lips sliding along the other man's jaw.

For a moment he let himself lie, breath ragged against Sasuke's ear, then the urgency was back, and he was pressed full length against Sasuke, blindly seeking another kiss. He was fuelled by a wilder feeling than even the kyuubi's hatred- one part sheer want, the other simply the /need/ to show Sasuke something- something that words didn't come near to describing.

Not- here. . .

Sasuke panted. Naruto pulled back, but not far, because tense arms were still wound around his neck. Sasuke looked like a stranger, yet somehow completely familiar. His dark eyes were hooded, and his lips red and swollen. Blood was streaked from his nose, smudged across his cheeks by tears and greedy fingertips.

And then a thought struck Naruto, an out of place and logical thought that managed to beat past the lust and the confusion.

Are you hurt

Sasuke loosened his grip and let Naruto go, dropping his head back against the scorched grass of the bank.

He was wet though, and his wrists were marked red with the strength of Naruto's grip. As Naruto sat up, and then stood, watching Sasuke stretched out on the ground there, he was filled with a sudden, protective urge. He wanted to take Sasuke back to his home, he wanted to have Sasuke there; with his blotchy, flushed face and flickering lowered eyelids. He wanted to /have/ Sasuke.

The want lurched at his throat, and Naruto hauled Sasuke to unsteady feet. They staggered a few steps in another kiss, blood pounding in Naruto's ears, and Sasuke's fists tangled in his hair.

Come- on.

The momentum of the fight before had carried on into the frantic kisses, and Sasuke could no more refuse to follow Naruto than force his heart to stop beating. He was completely lost, drawn onwards by tight, gripping fingers and greedy questing lips.

-

Naruto still had the sense to kick the door of his flat shut, and with fumbling fingers pull the latch. Sasuke was all over him, digging nails into his hips and pressing a ragged trail of open mouthed kisses along his neck.

  
Naruto tried, but it came out as a moan. He pushed Sasuke forwards towards the bedroom - sliding his hands inside the other man's jacket and tugging it from shaking shoulders. Sasuke scrabbled at the neck of Naruto's t-shirt, panting, and tugged him onwards. The blinds were still drawn, and the whole flat was cast in an odd, halflight, broken with strips of thin light from the shrouded window.

They stumbled over the sofa, Sasuke's chakra drained limbs buckling. His grip on Naruto's t-shirt, and the wasitband of his trousers was still strong, and when he fell he took them with him, tugging the trousers half down, and ripping the t-shirt.

It didn't distract Naruto at all- he was too far into Sasuke's lips and his eyes to even bother. The trousers were kicked off, and the t-shirt shrugged away, as the other man began sliding his tongue wet across Naruto's chest

They made it to the bedroom, somehow. Naruto could hear someone panting hard, and it took him a long time to realise that it was actually his own voice. His lips were still fixed to Sasuke's skin, and he could see the slice of the other man's pale neck, through fluttering eyelids.

Then no thought or control was needed anymore, and the frustration of a lifetime of rivalry, and five years of missplaced hatred was let free.


	7. Chapter 7

Naruto belongs to Kishimoto.

Worth- Part 7

When Sasuke woke up, it was evening, the light coming through the blinds warmer than before. Naruto was facing away from him, his arms curled against his chest, and his blonde hair tangled and spread across the mattress.

Sasuke sat up, and barely held in a groan. He ached all over- his limbs heavy with the dull pain of overexertion, and his ass hurting from another kind of overexertion entirely. That blow to his dignity was softened somewhat when he turned his attention to Naruto. The tanned stretch of the other man's back was interrupted with raw red scratches, scored by Sasuke's nails.

The air was pleasantly cool and still, and Sasuke found himself almost /comfortable/ listening to the unfamiliar sound of someone else's steady breathing as they slept.

It didn't take Naruto long to wake. He shifted and sighed- a long resigned sort of exhalation. One hand ventured to his back, and Sasuke watched him trace the marks there, puzzled, questing fingers.

Are you not going to let them heal  
Sasuke was surprised at how husky his own voice was. Naruto seemed to digest the question for a while, before letting his hand drop back down.

  
He rolled over, stretching catlike, so that shafts of sunlight striped his lithe body. Sasuke let himself watch without any kind of self-recrimination, because Naruto was beautiful. It was unexpected that beauty; unexpected and bittersweet.

Are you hungry  
Naruto sat and swung his legs over the side of his bed, rubbing his hair roughly with lean fingers. Sasuke leaned back on his elbows and watched.

I certainly am.  
Naruto answered himself, before casting a look back at Sasuke. His blue eyes were oddly serious, his mouth curved in a sad sort of smile.

Coffee would be nice.  
Sasuke managed, rubbing a hand across his face. It was strange to meet Naruto's eyes, and remember how they had looked, burning and hooded with lust. And even before that- red and pulsing with hate.

Naruto yawned so widely that Sasuke could hear his jaw crack.

I can get you that.  
He mumbled, getting to his feet and grabbing a pair of boxers from the floor. He was so endearingly sleepy, stumbling over his own discarded trousers, and kicking a few crumpled scrolls away as he shuffled through the lounge. Sasuke took a deep breath and then stood, wincing slightly.

He hurt, all over, and he felt weaker, and more emotionally drained than he had ever felt before, more even than when he had woken up from the nightmare of killing Naruto- and found it was true.

Sasuke felt however, that something had been resolved. Not the stupid, complicated issues of betrayal, and duty- but instead the old, tired problem they had always had. The rivalry that they had been tied to for so long seemed less like a painful burden, lighter, and calmer.

He could smell coffee, and dared himself to smile, to get up, and to hope.

-

Sakura watched Sasuke as he sat before the council. Naruto wasn't there, and his absence both worried her, and excited her. He could have passed on the verdict of the hearing because he couldn't bear to see Sasuke again, but Sakura got a strange feeling that it wasn't true. Something about the vaguely satisfied warmth in Sasuke's expression as he sat down. Something about the way his eyes fliickered briefly to the window.

Uchiha Sasuke.

The council members never really aged. They had probably been born old, Sakura thought, smiling at her frivolity. She felt a funny lighthearted cheer about the whole thing really. Because council or no council, she discovered that she /had/ forgiven Sasuke, and it was liberating.

We have come to a decision regarding your actions. Although the nature of your crime was great, evidence has confirmed that you were. . .

She tuned the drone of voices out, and watched Sasuke instead. He seemed, on the surface, to be sombre, paying close attention to ever word. But Sakura knew that pose of his well enough- his hands clasped, his gaze bland- to know that behind his serious front he was in another place entirely.

... . Because of this the decision has been made to approve your reinstatement as a Konoha ninja.

Just like that. Sasuke was forgiven, in a strictly legal sense perhaps, by the home town he had betrayed. Sakura knew however, that Sasuke was barely interested in Konoha's acceptance. He was waiting for confirmation to fall from someone else's lips.

As the scrolls were signed, and Tsunade drew the hearing to a close, Sakura saw Sasuke glance outside again, at a energetic group of six year olds thundering down the street, lead by an equally energetic teacher, trailing a scroll behind him like a banner.

As she approached Sasuke, he spoke, quietly, barely audible over the bustle of the council leaving.

I asked him if he was coming.

Sakura gripped her dress, hope freezing her to the spot. Sasuke sounded, almost affectionate.

And he said, only if I needed him too.

He turned, serious eyes and straight dark hair, and Sakura extended a hand.

How about some tea? As a celebration

She didn't say whether it was for being reinstated as a ninja, or for speaking with Naruto, but Sasuke knew what she really meant- she saw him almost smile.

-

It was crowded at the tea stand, and Sasuke and Sakura were forced to sit shoulder to hip, knees brushing. Where before it would have made Sakura blush with childish excitement, instead her excitment was more muted- a blush low in her stomach instead of across her face. It was no longer disheartening that Sasuke had that sort of effect on her.

You- talked to Naruto

Sasuke nodded, pouring himself and Sakura the tea, he pushed it towards her with a nod, and for the briefest moment their fingertips brushed.

I did.

He took a tiny sip, to test the temperature, then swept his hair back and took a larger sip. Sakura watched his throat working for quite a while before she noticed the marks. Red raw blotches, all the way down his neck, disappearing beyond the neck of his t-shirt.

At first she thoughtoh god, they fought' but the marks were - strangely shaped- not like the grip of a strangle hold, or the jolt of a jab to the neck. They looked far too like bite marks- a whole chain of them, vivid against his pale skin.

Oh, so he /talked/ to Naruto.

Did you sort things out

Sakura was surprised at how bitter she felt. Surely she had seen this coming? Her role in Sasuke and Naruto's relationship was as a middle ground, helping them to get to where they needed to be- to have each other. She had fullfilled her purpose.

Probably not.  
Sasuke glanced at her, and raised a hand to his neck, brushing the bitemarks carefully, his dark eyes almost amused.  
It wasn't exactly. . . fulfilling.  
It felt to Sakura that he was leaving something unsaid; that his wry little smile had another meaning behind it.

What do you mean  
She mumbled, annoyed. When had Naruto and Sasuke become so damned /similar? It seemed, that in becoming miserable, Naruto's humour had become a little darker- and Sasuke had miraculously developed a sense of humour of his own, that was achingly like Naruto's.

Sasuke stared fixedly at his tea for a second,completely lost in thought. Sakura wondered if he was remembering sex with Naruto; and felt a burn of jealousy.

I mean  
His voice was measured and serious, his eyes thoughtfully fixed to the rim of the cup before him.  
I wish you had been there too.

In the bustle of the tea-stand, Sakura found a sudden, impenetrable silence. A cold, confused little corner, where the warmth of the paper lamps couldn't reach.

Sasuke glanced at her, then sighed; such an infuriatingly /tolerant/ smile. Sakura couldn't move at all- as he leaned over, hooking his hand over the back edge of her seat, and removing her cup from her shaking hands - placing it carefully on the counter.

He waited for a moment, face close, and eyes still dark and amused. His eyes had been so cold before- and now, Sakura stuttered to herself, now they were warm. When had that happened?

When she thought about it, his eyes had been warm ever since that day in the courtyard, when he had told her he had never liked it when she cried.

He kissed her with another tolerant sort of sigh, curling one arm carefully around her back and brushing his tonge ever so gently across her lower lip. It was the kind of silly, romantic kiss she had dreamed of as a teenager; and Sakura appreciated the irony.

Of course, after the dream-kisses, she and Sasuke had gone on a dream-date through the village and he had let her wind a possesive arm around his waist. She doubted such a sickening display would ever be neccessary in reality.

He tasted of tea, which made sense, with his cup still steaming on the counter like that. He didn't taste of mfresh mint, or sunshine, or sugar clouds, like she had always imagined- and it was much nicer feeling his breath on her cheek as he exhaled slowly through his nose.

When he pulled back he pressed a finger down he cheek and gave her a slight smile.

Sakura thought about what it meant. She had once told Naruto that they didn't have a friendship- only a threesome. It had been a shot in the dark really, a desperate argument that had surfaced as she grappled for a way to explain how group seven /worked/. She had never imagined that it would be so accurate.

Suppose so.

She said, unable to lift the little frown from her features.

What about Naruto

Sasuke tilted head from side to side, as if he was weighing the situation up.

I guess  
He said eventually, taking a sip of his tea.  
We will just have to wait and see.

-

Naruto watched his class scatter, some headed to play some violent version of hide and seek, some off home for an early dinner, and others away to train; like dedicated little ninjas. He smiled to himself, and shoved his hands into his pockets.

Sasuke had left his flat a little under twenty four hours before, but he was still unsettled, as if the other man were still there. Naruto wasn't sure if it was a good kind of unsettled, or a bad kind- but he knew one thing for certain.

He wasn't /angry/ anymore.

And with that revelation still settling around him, he was just about ready to go home; clean up his flat, wash the sheets and deal with his problems later. But Kakashi was waiting for him; perched casually on the school wall, one of those bloody books dangled languidly from long fingers.

  
He said, dryly, slipping from the wall with feline grace.  
I'm a little late.

Naruto felt like scowling. No sensei, he grumbled to himself, You're irritatingly on time.

I thought we should talk.  
Kakashi offered, after they had walked for nearly five minutes. Naruto shurgged.

Sasuke was reinstated.  
He added, some time after. Naruto was tempted to shrug again.

That's good.  
He was surprised by how pleased he actually was. Somehow, the idea of Sasuke being around again- to fight with and shag senseless every now and then- was a rather attractive one. They probably would never be able to coexist in blissful domesticity, but on some level, Naruto imagined the relationship would work; if they took their time.

It was an about turn so swift, it might have knocked the breath from some people, but Naruto was a fickle, shifting person. It felt surprisingly natural making Sasuke coffee in the evening, having a brief argument about soup versus cereal for breakfast, and then watching him slope off down the road, dark head bowed

Kakashi smiled, tilting his head and stopping in the middle of the street. He rummaged around in his pockets for a while, with very little urgency. Kakashi rarely did anything with any urgency.

Here you go.  
He stretched out his hand towards Naruto, who blinked at the sudden glare of sunset on polished metal. Kakashi held a Konoha headband- Sasuke's headband, still battered and scratched. Naruto remembered waking up and finding it, cast away, after Sasuke had run from his betrayal.

He took it and sighed, weighing the metal plate carefully in his hand. It was hard for him to remember the anger, after hearing how Sasuke had felt; after understanding the wordless message behind frenzied kisses, and desperate, gentle fingers.

Mm, I'm to give this back him then, yeah

Kakashi nodded then shoved one hand in his pocket, reopening his book in the other.

If you want to.

He shrugged, and turned to go, so casually unconcerned. Naruto had to stifle a smiled. Nowadays he could read through Kakashi's nochalance. He knew that behind that lazy front the older man was really on a hair trigger- waiting for his response.

  
Naruto said, brightly.  
Why not

Had it been Tsunade, she probably would have reacted to his cheerful little statement with an explosive sort of screech, and a frenzied, on the spot interrogation. However, if there was one thing Naruto had learnt, it was that /nothing/ surprised Kakashi. He just raised a hand in parting, and strolled off, his attention already no doubt captured by the X-rated tales of Jungo, and his formidable string of ladies.

-

Naruto, supposedly was headed home. He was taking the longer, roundabout route, however, because he felt strangely /comfortable/ wandering the evening streets of Konoha. He had Sasuke's headband tucked neatly in the pocket of his vest; a friendly weight against his hip. He supposed that if he ran into Sasuke, he would be quite pleased to see him. Sakura too- he felt a pang of guilt, about how he had treated her recently.

Naruto knew himself that he wasn't particularily good at organising his feelings. He always knew what he wanted, but he never knew in what order they ranked at all. At that moment he rather wanted a bowl of ramen, and he knew that he wanted Sasuke, and that he wanted Sakura.

He placed the ramen first, due to immediate need, but Sasuke and Sakura fell in that urgent middle ground- where either would be lovely, and both would be convenient if nothing else.

More than convenient. He nearly groaned out loud at the thought. Sasuke /and/ Sakura. He felt vaguely that if he did any more with Sasuke he would have a burning need to share it with Sakura somehow- and he doubted she would appreciate /hearing/ about it in great detail.

Naruto shook his head, and strolled on, allowing himself to- just for a moment/imagine/.

And he was still imagining when he turned a corner and was faced with Sakura /and/ Sasuke, walking slowly towards him. Their heads were ducked, as if they were talking about something fascinating, and, as Naruto watched, Saske smirked and flicked a finger at Sakura's fringe, dark eyes affectionate.

It was just a little too like the start of his imaginings, infact- and Naruto found himself almost wordless. His desire for ramen swiftly and graciously relinquished first place to another kind of desire entirely.

  
Sakura looked delighted to see him, and Sasuke's expression, almost unreadable, might have been warm.

  
He waited for them, before giving Sasuke an awkward sort of nod for a greeting, and tugging gently on Sakura's hair.

How about we go for some ramen  
Sakura suggested, tentatively, standing almost as a bridge between the two men. Naruto pretended to think about it, humming and hah-ing, He grinned.

  
Sasuke looked visibly relieved.  
As long as HE pays  
Naruto added, with a playful jap in the centre of Sasuke's chest. Sakura looked at him as if he hed gone completely mad, green eyes wider than he thought was possible.

Naruto winked at her and turned, striding off in the direction of Ichiraku ramen, a spring in his step. Distinctly, behind him he heard Sasuke sigh wearily, and then say,

Whatever. I'll pay.

For some reason, the other man's tone made him grin even wider.

-

Naruto thought he had every right to take advantage of Sasuke's generous offer, so he ordered an extra/extra/ large bowl of miso; a portion size which had been invented for him specially.

Some things never change.  
Sasuke commented, dryly, taking a stool on Naruto's left. Sakura was seated on his right- and Naruto wondered if it was an intentional arrangement. Had he been lured by the sweet promise of ramen, only to be interrogated? Perhaps they wanted to have their wicked way with him!

He sniggered, snapping open his chopsticks. It wasn't as if he was going to complain or anything.

He dug into his bowl with gusto, watching Sasuke and Sakura aternately from the corner of his eye. Sasuke looked fairly calm, but the occasional glance towards Sakura betrayed him as nervous. Sakura was just downright shaken, frowning at her noodles and stirring them vacantly.

The way Sasuke cast his eyes over Sakura was almost protective, and Naruto sniggered, spurting miso soup over his chin. Sakura just sighed and handed him a napkin, but Sasuke looked puzzled.

What is so funny

Naruto slurped up the last of his noodles and wiped his face. He was really tempted just- to /show/ Sasuke what he had been thinking about.

Well I was just wondering.  
Sakura looked up from her barely touched bowl, sweeping her hair back in that way that made Naruto really want to kiss her.  
Would guys like to have sex with me? Y'know, at the same time

There was a long, gravid, pause. Then Sakura said Just as Sasuke said 

The following pause was even longer. Naruto looked at his empty bowl, and at Sakura's wide shocked eyes. Then turned to look at Sasuke, who looked completely torn, as everything in his life hung on whatever Naruto or Sakura said next.

I was just thinking about it, y'know? I guess it's your decision though.  
Naruto smiled- then rummaged in his pocket.  
Oh yeah. I forgot.

He laid the headband on the counter and pushed it towards Sasuke.

Gotta give you this, right

Sasuke looked at the headband, then at Naruto, then back at the headband. His expression was almost comedic in its bewilderment. Very carefully he picked it up, and tilted it between his hands. It took him a little while to tie it, on, because his fingers were shaking a little, and fumbling over the knot.

Suits you.  
Naruto said with a wink, and Sasuke leaned forward and kissed him, shifting his head so sharply that Naruto felt the clink of the two headbands knocking together. It was a gentler sort of kiss than their frantic efforts of the day before.When Sasuke pulled back Naruto smiled at him and slid from his chair, turning and offering Sakura his hand.

You coming

Sakura's mouth moved, but no sound came out. She blinked, and Naruto squeezed her hand gently, sliding his thumb along her wrist. Behind him Sasuke finished paying and gave her a serious look over Naruto's shoulder.

We can just go to his flat and have some coffee.

Sasuke's statement might have been more soothing had Naruto not been leering up at her while he said it. Sakura wondered if it was a good idea. But then she had been wondering whether things were a good idea all her life, and she was rather tired of it.

A-all right.

As soon Sakura got down from her chair she was immediately tucked under Naruto's arm, and a reassuring little kiss was pressed to her brow. Sasuke stood and watched, with his hands shoved in his pockets and a little smile on his lips.

On the way home, Sakura walked in the shelter of Naruto's arm, and Sasuke walked on his other side, close enough that their arms brushed with every step.

-

It took Sakura three cups of coffee and an hours worth of meaningless conversation to relax. She leaned in against Naruto, and soon her attempts at directing the conversation to safe topics trailed off.

You really- want to don't you  
She asked, just generally. Naruto responded by sliding his hand down her side and kissing her, Sasuke simply nodded.

Not just once as well  
Naruto murmured, leering at Sasuke.  


Sakura suprised both men with a sudden burst of laughter. She shifted closer to Naruto and pressed her nose softly against his arm.

Lots and lots, tonight

Naruto knew what she was asking, despite her subtle, lighthearted manner. He smiled and winked discreetly at Sasuke.

And tomorrow, and next wednesday. And on my birthday.Don't forget my brithday.  
Sasuke interjected, droll. Naruto shot him a mock glare.

Stop interrupting, you

Sakura waited for them to stop teasing each other, watching with her chin reasing against Naruto's side. She waited for Naruto to stop poking Sasuke's shin, and then for him to stop trying to grope the other man.

  
She said finally, once she was certain that she would get their full attention.  
If you plan on lots and lots, then you had better stop messing around, hadn't you.

It certainly got their attention.

AN: Thanks for all the reviews. This is the last full chapter, but there is an epilogue to go. I hope you have all enjoyed reading this!


	8. Epilogue

Worth- Epilogue

Tsunade stared at the scroll in front of her blankly, her brush hovering an inch above the table.

You're sure

She raised an eyebrow, and dipped her brush, still waiting for an answer. Naruto shifted a little- sheepish, and opened his mouth to speak.

  
Tsunade sniffed and tapped her finger impatiently against the desk.

Oh yeah I'm sure- it's just...

He pursed his lips and looked shiftily at the photographs along the wall behind her desk.

Spit it out, I don't have all day.  
She snapped. Naruto scratched his nose.

I don't have to wear that stupid hat all the time do I

Tsunade blinked. She glanced out of the window at the calm roofs of Konoha, glittering in the sun. And among the buildings, going about their daily lives, each ninja and seperate townsperson. She pitied every single one of them.

This' Tsunade thought wearilyIs your new leader.'

She signed the form anyway.

-

Outside the sun was dazzlingly bright, and Naruto almost stumbled into Sasuke and Sakura; waiting for him on the steps of the tower.

All done.

He said cheerfully, depositing a kiss on Sakura's neck, and giving Sasuke's backside a not-so-subtle squeeze. The other man tutted, but he looked like he was holding back a smile.

Are you going to teach  
Sakura asked, batting him away with a chuckle.

Mm? Yes. I'm taking them catching fish today.

Sasuke snorted at that, and waved a hand at the little crowd of children already gathered in the courtyard.

Looks like they're eager.

Sakura shifted to lean against Sasuke. She was standing on a higher step from him, and so could easily reast her elbow across his head, making his serious expression look utterly ridiculous. After a moment though he rolled his eyes and slid an arm around her waist.

You'll be back later  
Sakura asked. Naruto looked at Sasuke's strong, pale hands resting on her hip and her stomach and smiled a slow, sweet smile.

You bet

He leaned forwards and placed an indiscriminate kiss on whatever spot of skin, on whoever he could reach first, then jogged off, already crying out a greeting to his class.

Sakura glanced down at Sasuke and caught him sporting a wistful smile, his dark eyes foll wing the figure of the other man, bouncing and racing across the courtyard. She was filled with a sudden burst of grateful warmth at the thought of how things might have been.

Lucky, aren't we.  
Somehow, Sasuke had read her mind, and spoken aloud what she couldn't put words too.

  
She sighed as he shifted his head against her side.  
He's going to cost you a fortune in ramen.

Sasuke didn't have to say anything- they both knew it was worth it.


End file.
